[after the train crashed into the Ford Ranger] It was a little more trucky than I would have thought considering how much train there was.
This is all your fault. You killed my truck!
S5 E9Chasing Bobby
S5 E10Yankee Hankee
(Looking at his birth certificate on the computer) Place of birth: New York, NY!? BWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
Well, I suppose-- SUCKER PUNCH!
Interior scene, the Alamo. Hank comes across an array of various state and national flags. He reads the plaque next to them.
(reading) "These thirty-two flags honor the birthplaces of the Alamo defenders. Kentucky, Tennessee, Ohio, New York..." New York?
Hank notices and lifts the state flag of New York to see.
(continuing) "...they were born across America, but they died Texas heroes."
S5 E11Hank and the Great Glass Elevator
"Can't a man get his own Ranger Dog?"
I'm gonna kick your asses!
Why is it always about asses with you, Hank?
(outraged) You brought charcoal into our house!
I didn't know what it was! Luanne asked me to hold it for her, I thought it was drugs!
There's soot under my boy's nails. You don't get that from a clean-burning fuel.
Then you don't get the rich, smoky flavor either.
Shut your mouth! Now, we're going to sit here and pray.
S5 E12Now Who's the Dummy?
[Dale has hired Octavio to destroy a puppet that frightens him. Octavio spies on Hank and Bobby while Dale spies on Octavio.]:
OOctavio
(Into a tape recorder) 11:15 A.M.: The man and the boy and the puppet leave the house.
(Into a tape recorder) 11:16: Octavio speaks into tape recorder, thus leaving crucial evidence, stupid idiot! Octavio must be gotten rid of!
[Dale opens his glove-box to reveal a pistol...which he moves aside. Then he takes out a notepad and begins to write.]
(monotone) Dear Octavio, this is the hardest letter I've ever had to write...
[After dale puts Chip through a wood-chipper]
Dale, are you nuts!?
You'll never put that creep back together! I mixed him in with two chairs and a toboggan! Ha ha ha!
You're next! I'm kicking your ass through that thing!!
[inhales chloroform] You wouldn't hit an unconscious maaaaa.... [passes out]
CComputer
Perimeter Breach!
Perimeter breach? [Clicks through his different security cameras and sees the Bobby puppet looking at him through one of the cameras. Dale screams and inhales chloroform] You'll never catch Dale Griiiiib..... [Passes out. Scene cuts to the outside, showing Bobby holding the puppet to the camera with Hank looking on.
Heh, you were right, Bobbies. Ventriloquism is fun.
S5 E13Ho Yeah
The only woman I'm pimping from now on is Sweet Lady Propane. And I'm tricking her out all over this town.
[Trying to act like a pimp while confronting one.]
Alright, man, get outta that Jalopy and let's talk some bui'ness!
I am the mack daddy of Heimlich County, I play it straight up, yo. You get the hell outta my 'hood!
You get out... your hooker stuff... of my house!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's King of the Hill pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.