Kurt Hummel quotes from Glee

Blaine

I don't know how it worked at your old school, but did you notice that we all wear uniforms around here? It's about being a part of team.

Kurt

I guess I'm just used to having to scream to get noticed.

Blaine

You're not gonna make it as a Warbler if all you care about is getting noticed.

Kurt

You're right. I'm sorry.

Blaine

I know it's gonna take some getting used to, but you'll fit in soon enough, I promise.

Rachel

What I meant to say was, "wow, that really sucks. I'm sure you were really good."

Kurt

I was. I mean, I think I was. Being in The Warblers has really made me question everything I thought about myself.

Rachel

Yeah, what has become of us, Kurt? ...So, do you miss us?

Kurt

I do. Being a Warbler is great, but I don't think they appreciate my individuality as much as you guys did, and I can't help but think that I let you guys down.

Rachel

It's your life, Kurt, and you weren't safe at Mckinley any more, and we all get it.

Kurt

How come you were never this nice to me before?

Rachel

You were my only REAL competition.

Kurt

[smiles] True, true.

Will

Who's that? Someone special?

Kurt

Just a friend. But on the upside, I'm in love with him and he's actually gay. I call that progress.

Will

How you doing?

Kurt

Classes are harder, but the kids are kinder. But I miss you guys a lot though. So, what brings you here? Are you looking for teaching at a place where pencils aren't primarily used as weapons?

Blaine

(to Kurt) I need you to sing with me, well rehearse with me. I got a gig singing Baby it's Cold Outside in the the King's Island Christmas Spectacular.

Kurt

Ah a personal favorite! Too bad they'd never let us sing it together... I mean as two artists.

Kurt

Why hasn't Finn told me anything about this? We live together. I bring him a nice glass of warm milk every night just in hopes that we'll have a little lady chat.

Blaine

Warm milk? Really?

Kurt

It's delicious.

What can I get you?

Blaine

A Medium Drip, and a Grande Non-Fat Mocha for this guy, and maybe I can get him to split one of the Cupid cookies.

Kurt

You know my coffee order?

Blaine

Of course I do.

That'll be $8.40.

No one here knows I'm gay.

Kurt

Can I be honest? Just with the hair, I think they do.

Blaine, let's just be clear here. You and I got coffee twice, we're not dating. If we were I'd get arrested, considering your age.

Kurt

So, it's just like 'When Harry Met Sally'. But I get to play Meg Ryan.

Blaine

Deal. [pauses] Don't they get together in the end?

Kurt

[smiles and ignores the question]

Rachel

[burps] It tastes like pink. It tastes like pink! PINK!

Kurt

[dancing and talking to Finn] Are you not drinking?

Finn

No. Designated driver. What about you?

Kurt

I'm still trying to impress Blaine. Can't get too sloppy. [looks at Blaine]

Blaine

[dancing crazily]

Kurt

Clearly he doesn't have the same concern.

Blaine

Hey, it is so cool that you and Kurt are brothers...Like brothers. Wow. You're so tall.

Kurt

Are you having fun, Blaine?

Blaine

Yeah. This is the best party ever!

Rachel

Finny, dance with me. [dances with Finn] We had it going on, right? I wasn't making it up or anything? I'd do anything for you. Anything.

Finn

[lets go of Rachel] Okay Rachel, since this is your first time at this, I'm going to break it down for you. [sits down with Rachel]

Rachel

Okay.

Finn

Guys and girls fall into certain archetypes when they get drunk. Exhibit A: Santana, the weepy, hysterical drunk.

Santana

[crying] You like her more than me! She's blond and awesome and so smart. Admit it! Just admit it!

Sam

[confused]

Santana

No kiss me! [kisses Sam]

Finn

Lauren Zizes and Quinn, the anger girl drunks.

Quinn

I can't believe what you did to my body! I used to have abs!

Back off!

Lauren

Who told you that hairstyle was cool? Geronimo?

Chill out!

Finn

Brittany, the girl who also turns into a stripper drunk.

Brittany

[dancing]

Artie

[throwing money into the air] Makin' it rain! [laughing] That's my girlfriend. I love you babe.

Finn

Mercedes and Tina, happy girl drunks.

[laughing hysterically]

Finn

And then we come around full circle right back to you, Rachel. And right now you're being the needy girl drunk. Hanging all over me, being overly lovey. It's not cool.

Rachel

[frowns and pats Finn's back] What-What kind of girl is this? [stands up] Let's play spin the bottle!

Kurt

This is outstanding!

Rachel

Blaine Warbler, I am going to rock your world. [kisses Blaine for a long time]

Kurt

Okay, I think we've seen enough.

Rachel

[stops kissing Blaine] Your face...tastes awesome. I think I just found a new duet partner!

Rachel

The date was lovely. We saw Love Story at the Revival Theatre - we even dressed up as the characters.

Kurt

[says sarcastically] That's not gay at all.

Rachel

Blaine and I have a lot in common.

Kurt

A sentiment expressed by many a hag by many dating a gay.

Burt Hummel

[Having "the talk" with his son] Now for most guys sex is, just, ya know, this thing we always want to do. Ya know, its fun, feels great, but we're not really thinking too much about, ya know, how it makes us feel on the inside, or, ya know, how the other person feels about it.

Kurt Hummel

Women are different?

Burt Hummel

Only because they get that its about something more than just the physical. Ya know, when you're intimate with somebody, in that way, you're exposing yourself, ya know, you're never gonna be more vulnerable, and that scares the hell out of a lot of guys. Believe me, I can't tell you how many buddies I've got who have gotten way too deep with a girl who said she was cool with just hooking up.

Kurt Hummel

But that's not going to happen to me, Dad.

Burt Hummel

No, its gonna be worse. Because its two guys. With two guys you got two people who think that sex is just sex. Its gonna be easier to come by. And once you start doing this stuff you're not going to want to stop. Yah just... you gotta know that it means something. You know, its doing something... to you, to your heart, to your self esteem, even though it feels like... you're just having fun.

Kurt Hummel

So you're saying I shouldn't have sex?

Burt Hummel

I think on your 30th birthday it is a great gift to yourself.

Burt Hummel

Kurt, when you're ready, I want you to be able to... do everything. But when you're ready I want you to, use it as a way to connect to another person. Don't throw yourself around, like you don't matter. 'Cause you matter, Kurt.

Kurt Hummel

[pause] Is that it?

Burt Hummel

That's it, for now. Can I make you some toast?

Kurt Hummel

I think I'll take it up to my room to eat while I look over my new pamphlets

Kurt Hummel

. Thank you Dad.

Hummel

You're welcome.