Denny Crane quotes from Boston Legal

Denny

Thank you, Alan, for coming with me.

Alan

I think friends should always encourage friends to get their heads examined.

Gracie Jane.

Denny

Denny Crane.

Gracie Jane.

Denny

Are you making fun of me?

Denny

Here's a little secret. I know things. Don't tell.

Alan

That secret seems unbelievably safe.

[referring to the poor in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina] Maybe they couldn't get out. Maybe they thought the federal government might rescue them or, failing that, give a damn.

Denny

How stupid is that?

Alan

You and Jane Fonda?

Denny

Lest we forget Barbarella. Then she turned on me. Went red. They caught her in one of those communist bitch hunts.

Alan

I think you mean witch hunts.

Denny

No, I'm right on this one.

Alan

Denny, I could be wrong, but you might want to think about settling this.

Denny

You're absolutely right. You could be wrong.

Denny

You, kid.

Garrett

Yes. sir.

Denny

Fix my tie. [to Sara] You, you know my name?

Yes, sir.

Denny

Good. Maybe someday I'll learn yours.

Denny

Seriously, do I act like I'm the only one in the room?

Alan

Denny, one of the things I love about you is when we talk, often it's as if you're not even in the room.

Denny

What are you doing in my office?

Paul

This is my office, Denny.

Denny

Oh, that must mean I've come to see you...why?

Denny

Denny Crane.

Shirley

That is not a legal defense.

Denny

Think we'll ever see the day when the defense lawyer will be legally permitted to shoot the defendant?

Alan

We seem to be making progress.

Denny

Denny Crane. I'll be your attorney.[imitating to shoot somebody]

Nice night.

Denny

Suddenly it is.

Denny

What the hell kinda charity is 'Children's Group'?

Shirley

We're teaching children to read.

No, we're buying them food.

Alan

I thought we were providing them with old people to play with.

Shirley

This is unprofessional, Denny. You are setting a very bad example for the rest of the firm.

Denny

Understood. And, from now on, in this office, those blinds go down before anybody else does.

Denny

So, do you like her yet? You promised.

Alan

I did. And I do.

Denny

I thought you would. She has many fine qualities.

Alan

She makes my friend smile. That's the only quality that matters.