Have fun on your vacation, Madeleine.
Fun? It's 20 degrees colder in Minnesota than it is here. Penguins go there and say: "wow, it's cold, let's leave".
They have talking penguins there, and you still don't want to go?
CareyBye, Maddie. [hugs her]
[pulling Carey away and hugging Maddie again] Bye, Maddie.
Carey
Zack, remember how we talked about people's personal space?
Yeah, and I like Maddie's space the best.
LLou
Great news! We've sold Zack and Cody!
Marvellous! I'll get some bubble wrap, and we'll ship them off immediately!
BBud
No, we've sold a sitcom about twin boys living in a hotel, and you're all in it!
Oh! we're going to be stars!
LLou
No, you're not, we'll hire actors to play you.
BBud
But you're all invited to Hollywood to be consultants on the show!
LLou
But you'll have to pay your own way there.
We could all go in my private jet!
But we're all out of salted nuts.
I've had enough of this silliness. I'm out of here.
Oh, no! Don't unwrap it! Who knows what it looks like after thousands of years! Aah, it hideous!
Carey
Come here, honey, are you okay?
Swell. I'm just a little dizzy.
Welcome back? You left me wrapped up for hours. Where have you been? I thought you were coming right back to get me.
Well, we did. But the mummy we took was just a doll wrapped in gauze. It was a total fake!
DDakota
How did you find out the mummy was a fake?
Liar, liar, cargo pants on fire! This necklace is probably plastic! Here, Maddie, you can have it.
DDakota
Actually, the necklace is real emerald.
Thanks for holding it for me, Maddie.
Carey
If the artifacts are real, why would you have a fake mummy?
DDakota
Because I couldn't find the real one. I spent eight years in the jungle, living on beetles and bats' blood.
DDakota
I've found all these beautiful treasures. But nobody cares about them if I don't have some stupid mummy. It's all about the mummy... mummy, mummy, mummy!
Carey
I think he has mummy issues.
24% compounded yearly means 2% compounded monthly?
Carey
Zack, you just did math in your head!
Wow! I did! You know, if they just put dollar signs in front of the numbers, math would be a whole lot easier.
Except that I didn't graduate, okay!
(Everybody gasps)
There's a shock! (takes back his gift and steps away)
What are you talking about?
Carey
I don't, I don't understand. I mean you have a diploma...(unrolls fake diploma and sees the truth) This is a picture of a girl wearing a bikini.
(looks at it also) Uh, she's hot! I mean...it's hot...at the beach...that's why she's wearing a bikini...
Carey
Zack, why did you do this?
Because you tried to bake a cake and Dad left his tour, and I didn't want to disappoint you guys again.
Don't sweat it, dude, it's okay. (Carey smacks him in the gut) OOF!!! I mean, you are so in trouble!
Why is it so hot in here?
Carey
Because it's summer school, which you have to go to for failing the eighth grade.
Just English class. Besides, plenty of our greatest leaders failed the eighth grade.
Carey
Like who?
There was that Abe guy, with the beard and tall hat. He lived in Gettysburg and died at the movies.
Carey
And, yet, you passed History.
Zack, I don't understand. You were doing so well. What got into you?
My underwear! And I didn't want it to happen again.
Carey
(enters the classroom) Hey, Zack, let's go!
He's not going anywhere. Zachary has detention.
Carey
Detention?!? Great, now I'm stuck here, too! (sits at a desk) Listen, young man, you had better not fail out of summer school. You're runnin' out of seasons. If you think that I am going...
(Carey makes a zipper motion to her lips)
Carey, wait. Aren't you gonna read a bedtime story? Mother always reads me a story.
Yeah, Mom used to read us stories too. Then we turned six.
You're never too old for a classic. [takes out a book]
Carey
The Little Engineer That Could. Ahh, let me guess. It's about a hotel engineer that thought he couldn't fix something and then he can.
Carey
Arwin, don't you want to take a break and... go home?
No, I should really stay and fix this.
Carey
But it wasn't broken when you got here.
[yanks out cord from under sink] It is now!
Carey
Here, sing this [plays C note on harmonica] ♪ Do re me fa so la ti doh ♪
How am I supposed to remember all that?
Carey
Well... you could...uh, think of things that remind you of each note. [plays C note on harmonica] ♪ Do ♪
Ooh, that's easy! Dough means money!
Carey
♪ Re, me ♪
Carey
♪ Fa, so ♪
If something's far, I say "So?" because I have a private jet.
Carey
♪ La ♪
"Law" is something you get to break if you're rich.
Carey
♪ Ti ♪
Carey
♪ Do ♪
Carey
'Kay. Now let's try putting it all together.
Dough! Yay, me! [claps] Far, So? Law, T [high-pitched and off-key] ♪ Dough! ♪ [glass on the table shatters] Mazel tov!
The Suite Life of Zack & Cody · 501 quotes
