Jessica quotes from The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Zack

How about I show you one of Boston's most elegant restaurants? Ever had a 7-meat pizza?

Jessica

That sounds intriguing! ...Or disgusting...

Zack

It's both! So, how about it?

Jessica

Thanks! But... I don't go anywhere without my sister Janice.

Zack

No problem. I'll take my vitamins.

Jessica

I meant - could you bring your brother?

Zack

That's another way to go...

Zack

And then I get back and they're all crying into their pizza!

Carey

Well, honey, I'm sorry your date was ruined, but you got what you deserved.

Zack

Is there no shoulder for me to cry on?

Carey

You pushed you brother to go out before he was ready just so you could have fun. Honey, it's gonna be a long time before he's comfortable around girls.

Cody

[entering the suite with Jessica and Janice, all laughing] I had a wonderful time, ladies.

Jessica

Don't forget, see you tomorrow for breakfast.

Janice

Tea and scones! [they both kiss Cody's cheeks]

Cody

Pip, pip! Cheerio! Ta-ta! Peace out! [girls leave] Yes! Zack, I can't thank you enough. If you hadn't told me to get back out there, I'd be sitting here alone and so depressed! ♪Rule Britannia, Britannia rule the wave...♪

Aw

Yeah!

Esteban

[to the twins] So, little blonde peoples, to help me help my little sister, (begging) will you please take my ballroom dance class?

Zack

We're into more manly sports.

Cody

Yeah, we're more slam dunks then, grande jeté!

Zack

And some of us are even to manly too say, let alone do, a grande jeté.

Jessica

Actually, I adore ballroom dancing.

Janice

Me too. It's so romantic.

Jessica

Really romantic.

(cheerfully turn to Esteban) SIGN US UP!!

Jessica

Zack, your theory of the origin of the universe is fascinating.

Janice

Really fascinating.

Cody

Ok, I can't take this, the theory of the universe is the string theory, not the string cheese theory.

Zack

Jessica, you're leading again.

Jessica

I'm leading because you're hesitating.

Zack

Well, I'm hesitating because you keep critising me.

Jessica

I'm criticzing you because you're not doing it right.

Zack

I'm not doing it right because you're yelling.

Jessica

You're the one who's yelling. (turns away from each other)

Jessica

Ow! You stepped on me again!

Zack

I stepped on you because your foot is not supposed to be there.

Jessica

That's where you lead me!

Zack

Ha! It'd be easier to lead a donkey!

Janice

Why are being so rude to my sister?

Zack

Oh, like it's my fault she pushes me around like a bulldozer.

Jessica

(gasps) I will not be spoken to that way!

Janice

No, we won't!

Cody

Wait, that was a compliment.

Janice

How?

Cody

I have no idea.