Kurt quotes from The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Zack

Don't take this the wrong way. I'm going home to Mother.

Kurt

That's what your mother said when she left me, and a few other things I can't mention.

Kurt

Come on, have a sense of humor!

Carey

I married you, didn't I?

Kurt

There it is!

Kurt

I know you're mad.

Carey

I was mad when you sold our car to buy a new guitar. I was mad when you came home from the playground with the wrong twins.

Kurt

It was an honest mistake.

Carey

They were girls.

Zack

Except that I didn't graduate, okay!

There's a shock! (takes back his gift and steps away)

Kurt

What are you talking about?

Zack

I faked the whole thing.

Carey

I don't, I don't understand. I mean you have a diploma...(unrolls fake diploma and sees the truth) This is a picture of a girl wearing a bikini.

Kurt

(looks at it also) Uh, she's hot! I mean...it's hot...at the beach...that's why she's wearing a bikini...

Carey

Zack, why did you do this?

Zack

Because you tried to bake a cake and Dad left his tour, and I didn't want to disappoint you guys again.

Kurt

Don't sweat it, dude, it's okay. (Carey smacks him in the gut) OOF!!! I mean, you are so in trouble!

Kurt

Sneaking girls in here without my permission is totally inappropriate.

Zack

Well...Now that you're here, can we have your permission?

Kurt

Oh, sure. Go on. Knock yourselves out...are you kidding?!