Carey quotes from The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Carey

[to Zack] Come on, Pumpkin!

Zack

Mom, ix-n-ay on the umpkin-p-ay.

Carey

Orry-s-ay.

Carey

You have to figure out what you're going to do.

Zack

Don't worry. I've got International Day covered.

Carey

Bringing in a slice of Swiss cheese doesn't count.

Zack

What if I put it on a German kaiser roll?

Carey

Boys, why is there a woman with a fish at the door?

Zack

Mori-san.

Hi.

Cody

We invited our friend over for dinner. She's a famous singer from Japan.

Carey

Oh, yes! You're performing at the Nakamura Convention. I'm also a singer.

Oh, you famous, too? Singing in front of lots of people making lots of money.

No.

Carey

My fan club.

Zack. Cody. Where's Kumiko!

Zack

I only tell you if you promise not to get angry.

I promise.

Cody

Zack lost her at school.

Zack

I think he's angry.

How do you lose a woman!

Cody

You forget to cherish her.

Carey

Aw, and that's why your my special little man.

The Nakamori executives are expecting a brilliant japanese singer less than an hour and what am I to do?

Cody

Mom's a brilliant singer.

And there's just one problem, she's not japanese.

(to Zack as she is chopping a fish) Don't worry. As a sign of respect, I will save the eyeballs for Mommy.

Carey

(scared) Oh goody.

Esteban

What are you all doing here?

Carey

Cody said you were teaching dance and we couldn't wait to learn from the great Esteban.

Esteban

So he told you I was desperate for money and you took pity on me.

Carey

Pretty much.

Esteban

And I'm okay with that.

Carey

Okay!

London

Ooh, sign me up, too! I have a whole closet full of ballroom dancing clothes I finally get to wear, then throw out.

Zack

[to Cody] Why is she still here?

Carey

To remind you not to see anything inappropriate, like Bullet Sandwich or Zombie Mom.

Cody

Fine, but when you pick us up, no hugging and no calling us "my little men."

Carey

Why don't you just rip my heart out?

Zack

I think that's how Zombie Mom ends.

(startles Carey) Towels, lady?

Carey

Sorry. Didn't hear you come in. I was too busy setting up my painting supplies. The boys are out of town. You know, I used to paint all the time. Then the twins were born, I had to set it aside. Kept telling myself I'd get back to it next week or the week after that. But I never did. Oh well, better later than never though, right?

(blank face) Towels, lady?

Carey

Okay. I brought a blanket and a hot water bottle.

Cody

No! Don't you know anything about mothering?

Carey

Apparently not.

Arwin

Cody, I made something that is gonna help you bond with the baby.

Carey

Cody, for the record I'm in all of favor of what you're doing here but I think this time Arwin has gone a little too far.

Arwin

This is not going too far. (Puts on a helmet that has a giant bird head on it)

So, where's the patient?

Carey

That would be me, the woman lying in bed, sneezing her guts out.

Actually, you can't really sneeze your guts out. I wrote a paper on it.

Cody

What grade did you get?

That's not important!

Zack

For Cody, two hundred single-ply napkins.

Cody

I wanted two-ply.

Zack

[throwing box in Cody's direction] Glue them together. [the box hits Cody's head.]

Cody

Ow...

Zack

Here's an ice pack. [prepares to throw it]

Cody

Never mind!

Carey

Honey, why don't you just walk the stuff in to him?

Zack

It's not my fault all he can catch is a cold.

Carey

Zack, I can't believe you're being that shallow.

Cody

Face it, Mom. He's as shallow as a kiddie pool.

Zack

At least I'm not scared to swim in one.

Carey

(after finishing her push-ups) TEN! (reaches to grab the donut)

Zack

(takes the donut before Carey)

Carey

Honey, that was my reward!

Zack

Well being a mother reward enough?

Carey

Boys, what's going on here?

Zack

There's a dead body in that bag!

Are these your kids?

Carey

Are you guys cops?

No.

Carey

Then, yes.