S11 E8 The Tesla Recoil
Well, if it helps, you all behaved terribly and you deserve what you got.
Well that doesn't help, at all. Sometimes your social skills are very poor.
I can't believe we let Kripke use us like that.
You know, maybe you're all more like the guy who didn't invent the electric car, and less like the guy who didn't invent the light bulb.
She's right, maybe we're all a bunch of Teslas after all. [Howard and Sheldon smile]
Didn't Tesla die penniless, forgotten and insane?
You may have a point about her social skills.
He did fall in love with a pigeon.
Well, if we're gonna call Tesla crazy for loving something small and unappealing, we might as well put Penny in a padded cell right now.
S11 E9 The Bitcoin Entanglement
Hey. What are you guys doing?
Uh, we have a bunch of Bitcoin on an old laptop, and it could be worth, like, a lot of money.
No. We-we could be sitting on a fortune.
Okay, let the record show, I did not marry you for money, but you just got way more attractive.
You can't still be mad about that.
Please. I have grudges going back to kindergarden. One day, I plan to find an adult Emily Dwyer and make her eat a crayon while I watch.
Is that why there's an Emily Dwyer on our invitation list?
Of course. That night, I will have the first dance, and the last laugh.
S11 E10 The Confidence Erosion
What do you think will make the wedding worse for Amy: a cake made with salt instead of sugar or a cake iced with congealed gravy?
That is a trick question. The answer is: you as the groom.
Neither of them will be the actual cake. I'm just using it as a bargaining chip to get Amy to agree to the whole wedding party getting rings and us getting one ring to rule them all.
Amy, I never thought I'd want to marry anyone. So the fact that I found you is astonishing. It's-it's like finding dark matter, except they're looking for dark matter. I wasn't even looking for you. S-So you're even better than dark matter.
Plus, plus, you interact with light, so I can see you. And, also, you don't account for the missing mass in the universe. Oh, and...
Okay, I think you're getting caught up on the ways I'm not like dark matter.
S11 E11 The Celebration Reverberation
Well, this party's a disaster.
Don't blame the party! You know how many favors I had to call in with my bounce house guy to get Wonder Woman?
Technically, it's a Chinese knockoff called Happy Strong Swimsuit Lady.
Oh, Stuart, two questions: Do you have the new Aquaman, and do you mind if I use your back room to smoke some meat?
Well, since it's you asking, I'm gonna guess that's not a euphemism.
Why are you smoking meat? And why are you reading Aquaman?
I am trying to make Amy a historically accurate Little House on the Prairie dinner for her birthday, and I want to be able to say I was reading it before it was cool.
Wow, well, that's actually really sweet. The dinner thing. The Aquaman thing's dumb.
S11 E12 The Matrimonial Metric
[referring to Sheldon and Amy] Are they acting strange?
I don't think they're acting.
[testing to see how well their friends know them] I was talking to my favorite aunt.
Did she ever figure what that thing on her knee was?
Turned out to be a chocolate chip.
That makes sense, she does love to bake.
She does, you are a thoroughbred!
S11 E13 The Solo Oscillation
Making a boat. When I was a kid, my dad showed me how.
Boy, you'll do anything to avoid reading.
S11 E14 The Separation Triangulation
I'm Rajesh Koothrappali. Thank you for taking a walk with me... through the stars.
That pause seems to get longer every time.
I do believe... you're right.
[Showing a picture on his phone] It's me in bed with a beautiful woman, and my watch showing the time as 2:30 AM.
S11 E15 The Novelization Correlation
Howard, I want you to know I forgive you.
Do you even know what he's forgiving you for?
Don't know, don't care. Happy Yom Kippur to me.
I just learned some distressing news. Amy sometimes doesn't do things because it would hurt my feelings.
First of all, it's not sometimes, its always.
Second, it's not just Amy, it's everyone.
And third, it's not news, it's well established.
S11 E16 The Neonatal Nomenclature
[first lines as Bernadette wakes Howard up] Howie. Howie, wake up. It's time.
[waking up] Oh. Did your water break?
Are you feeling any contractions?
[she starts to climb out of bed] Wait. Well, where are you going?
To the hospital. Today's my due date, and this crap needs to end now.
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Big Bang Theory pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License .
