(to Radar) One more word and I'll nail your tongue to your nose.
S1Major Fred C. Dobbs
(to Hawkeye and Trapper) I'm gonna do more than that. (Storms out office door, and then right back in) What am I doing? This is my office. You guys, get out!
(to Trapper) The three basic emotions are greed, fear, and greed. Frank Burns is crazy for money, he married for money, he became a doctor for money. If there was money in dying, he's thrown himself under a truck."
(sispicious) I smell a rat… no, two rats.
S1Ceasefire
GCGeneral Clayton
Henry, are you sitting down?
[stands up] No, sir.
CClayton
Maybe you better.
[sits down] Yes, sir.
Is he giving you calisthenics over the phone?
Call us if you need us.
Yeah, but don't need us.
S1Showtime
Are you going over my head?
No, just through the hole in it.
It's bad enough that she's having a baby and I can't be there with her!
Well at least you were there for the important part.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's M*A*S*H pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.