I am the hoe master! hear me hoe! [nearly runs over Hank and Bill and damages Bill's wall]
S4 E8Not In My Backhoe
(Talking into tape recorder) 10:15. Hank picks up Hal.
What?
(On tape recorder) 10:15. Hank picks up Hal.
(On tape recorder) What?
I said, "10:15, Hank picks up Hal!"
S4 E9To Kill A Ladybird
Bobby, you name a pet, you name a guitar, but you do not name a filthy animal!
[while standing on a tree branch] This...isn't...over. So long, suckers! [caws like a bird]
[while laying face down in the dirt] Hank, I can see your house from up here.
S4 E10Hillenium
My gerbil screwed me!
I live in a shack, I poop in an outhouse, I eat what I kill.
There isn't a Mrs. Chappy, is there Chappy?
S4 E11Old Glory
Well, works for me; say is "the cocoa".
S4 E12Rodeo Days
If our young bucks are ready our young bulls are, too, it's gonna get crazy out there every cow for himself, don't tie up anything with two legs, then go, Oh, hey!
S4 E13Part I: Hanky Panky
(sighs) Mr. Strickland's wife is beautiful.
That's NOT his wife. That's Debbie from work. 'Pretty girl like that should have been able to get a date.
Peggy gives Hank a look as if he has no clue about his boss' reputation
The "S" stands for service. The "T" is for trust. (Mr. Strickland and Debbie make out) "R" is for reliability. (doors are heard opening and closing) Now the "I", that stands for...
Woman's voice{offscreen}: Jackass!
Camera shows that Elizabeth "Miz Liz" Strickland has entered the banquet
M.F. Thatherton{offscreen}: Oh ho, it's Miss Strickland! This ought to be good!
No, heh, heh. It's for integrity. That's not even the right letter.
Now, now Miz Liz. We're in public.
YOU ARE IN PUBLIC WITH THIS LITTLE BIMBO... IN FRONT OF HALF OUR CHRISTMAS CARD LIST! (notices Debbie's earrings) Are those my mother's earrings?!
"C" is for compassion....
I WANT YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE!!
But Miz L...
AND OUT OF THE LAKE HOUSE!!
The lake house?
Please forgive me for stealing your thunder Hank. Please continue.
Miz Liz departs banquet hall
Okay now, where was I?
"D" for done.
S4 E14Part II: High Anxiety
Dad! Dad, the police are lookin' for you!
(whispering to himself) Oh, god! Debbie's hippie roommate turned me in for smokin' narcotics!
Haaaank!
No coincidence. I like to hump, I like to eat, and I don't like to drive.
I am inducing vomiting!
I said good day, Sheriff!
How long does it take Debbie to throw in a load of laundry? I really need to talk to her.
She should be right up. Debbie said you were gonna... HEYYYY!
No, we were not. It was a trick.
Is $300 too much for a Hot Wheels VW Purple Evil Weevil?
(sighs) Yeah, I could use one too.
Damn, the ebay auction closed. I lost my weevil.
Dang it. Could I get a light off yours? Huh, that's a funny looking cigarette. You roll it yourself?
Yeah.
You got a weak flame on this thing. (Hank breathes it and coughs) This isn't one of them clove cigarettes, is it?
No man. That's the chronic, from Mexico.
Huh, damn NAFTA. It's clearly an inferior tobacco.
So, does your wife party too?
Party? Uh, we throw a party for Fourth of July and Labor Day.
No, I mean party, you know. Get high. Get stoned.
BWAHHHHHHH!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's King of the Hill pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.





