You are dressed like the Phantom of the Opera. He's not a vampire.
He eats theater people.
No, he doesn't.
I think he might.
He does.
Do you even know who the Phantom of the Opera is?
He might not.
He doesn't.
I don't.
S6 E7Who Got Dee Pregnant?
Yes, I was having an argument with Artemis, because a couple weeks before, we had some makeup sex in a dumpster out in the back of Wendy's. [Cuts to a dumpster shaking] [Frank grunting] Yeah! Yeah!
She incorporated a bun in the lovemaking. She took the--the...the dough and rolled it up into a ball, and then she...and we were going berserk. She loves that kind of stuff, and I-I...I admit I do, too.
That's when Dee came in. Oh, hey, Dee.
[A ostrich appears in the doorway]
ODOstrich Dee
[prolonged squawking]
Look, I do not give a shit about your problems, Dee, okay? I'm still pumped up from that ass-whooping I just handed out. Did you see that?
ODOstrich Dee
[squawking continues]
I don't give a shit, Dee, okay? I don't know how you're going to get all that milk off of you.
ODOstrich Dee
[squawks]
What is that supposed to mean?
ODOstrich Dee
[squawking]
Okay, you know what, shoo. Shoo. Get out of here.
S6 E8The Gang Gets a New Member
PPrincipal
I'm a little confused, are you telling me this photo of Bruce Jenner is your resume?
Well, when I showed up this morning I didn't have a formal resume on me so I was sort of hoping the photograph of Mr. Jenner could represent the standard of excellence I'm hoping to bring to this position.
S6 E9Dee Reynolds: Shaping America's Youth
A lot of great actors have done blackface.
There's countless examples of very classy actors doing black face. We got the great C. Thomas Howell in Soul Man. We got the Wayans Brothers in White Chicks. That was a very tasteful example of reverse blackface.
Principal McIntyre, I recently starting mentoring one of the kids here.
PMPrincipal McIntyre
Really? That's odd, because you're a janitor.
You gotta do the lips funny!
James Earl Jones is doing a great blackface.
Because James Earl Jones has a black face.
S6 E10Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats
You've been really stressed so I thought I'd take you to a spa day. Just the two of us.
A what day?
Spa day.
What is this word, spa? I feel like you're starting to a say a word and you're not finishing it. Spaghetti? Are you taking me to a spaghetti day?
oh my god i just found a rats nest slaughtered about 200 of them. It's like whole generations of those things have died at my hands. Mothers, fathers, grandfathers, little baby rats.
Well, you know, keep up the good work.
Sometimes, I wonder though, if our lives are really more valuable than theirs. You know what I mean?
Yeah they are. Our lives definitely are without a doubt.
What does 3D even stand for?
3rd Dimension. Just... shh. Please stop talking.
3rd Dimen... (chuckles) What dimension are we in?
Shh, Charlie. I don't know. Shh.
Isn't stuff... like... suppossed to pop out at us?
I don't know. I'm not sure. Let's watch and find out.
[bird screeching]
Wow. Did you see that?
Yeah, yeah. I saw that.
That came like right at you. Is this safe?
Charlie (eating spaghetti out of a zip-loc bag): What's your spaghetti policy?
S6 E11The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods
Are you wearing makeup?
I'm always wearing a little bit of foundation but that's not the point.
Animals should be food, rugs and trophies. Why do you think I'm wearing a leather suit?
That's leather? I thought it was plastic.
Who the hell wears a plastic suit?
I just don't question the things you do anymore.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.