If I don't get this part, I'm never gonna eat macaroni and cheese again.. [After a second] I didn't say that.. That doesn't count
S6 E20The One with Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Aren't you dressed yet ?
Am I naked again ?
[While playing Foosball]
How cool it would be, If you could watch a life size version of this ? How crazy would that be ?
As crazy as Soccer ?
I have answering machine..
Which I bought for you.. Taught how to use it.. You thought it was a copier...
S6 E21The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad
All right, a joke -- lighten the mood. Two guys walk into a bar, and one of them is Irish.
I'm Irish.
... And the Irish guy wins the joke.
It seemed my prom date had stood me up. So, selflessly, Ross offered to take me.
What a sweet story!
So, Ross, you were in college, and you jumped at the opportunity to take a young girl to her high school prom?
Wow! Did not see that one backfiring.
PSPaul Stevens
So, Ross what's your problem?
Excuse me?
Why can't you get a girlfriend your own age?
S6 E22The One Where Paul's the Man
[Elizabeth and Ross are kissing.]
What's wrong?
I'm sorry, I was just thinking about your father.
Okay... well, whatever works for you.
[to self] Okay, you're doing well. She likes you. And you know why? Because you are a neat guy. You are the man. You are the man! [sings] "I'm just a love machine..."
Fine, have me fired. But I want you to know that we are not that different. I mean...I too, am a "neat guy".
[while making out at the cabin] Hey umm, you brought protection right?
Why? Are there like bears or something? [looks around nervously and then sees that Elizabeth is shaking her head no] Ohh. Oh, protection. Yeah-no, yeah-no, that-that-that I forgot.
Please, stop freaking out.
I'm not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman named Heldi called and said we were getting married, but that happens everyday.
Honey, we were at this beautiful place, and I-I-I just put our names down for fun! I mean, what's the harm in that?
Right here!
Chandler, please don't think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel...
Phoebe and Rachel! So the people that knew about our wedding before me were you, Phoebe and Rachel, Heldi, and apparently some band called Starlight Magic 7 who are available by the way!
It was a mistake. Please don't take this to mean anything, because it doesn't.
Okay.
Really?
Yes, if it really doesn't mean anything, because you know that I'm just not ready...
I know! I know.
Okay.
I'm gonna go tell Joey that... that you're back. I was really worried about you.
[Monica leaves and Phoebe comes out of the guest bedroom]
Hey, did she buy it?
Totally.
So did Heldi show you the place?
Yeah, it's beautiful.
I can't believe you're gonna ask Monica to marry you!
[smiling] I know.
S6 E23The One with the Ring
I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
That's easy! You just have to think of him as a -- as a jar of pickles that won't open.
So, what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?
No, that's what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
I know of two surefire ways to shut a man up. And one of them is sex.
What's the other one?
I don't know. I've never had to use the other one.
Hey, when we were married, you know what I never got? Uh, sex.
Uh, yeah, well, no ring, no sex- big surprise.
Get me a musket and we'll talk.
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