CSI: Crime Scene Investigation · Season 10
Put down the saw! Step away from the guitar. You were about to commit murder on an immaculate '62 Fender jazz bass with the original factory paint.
So, what?
For someone from the Great State of Texas, you show very little respect for a true American art form.
Hey, just 'cause I'm from Texas doesn't mean I like country music.
You know, I read something a while back. Said that the distance from home that the average parent would allow their 9 year old to wander had shrunk to a tenth of what it was when I was a kid.
The world's a scarier place, that's for sure.
Oh, I was terrified back then. But a boy who ventures out thinking the world isn't a place to hide from, shouldn't be proven wrong.
If someone wanted to plant blood, they could do it in any crime scene. What kind of a monster would kill a kid to accomplish that?
The same kind of monster who couldn't just divorce Samantha Rose.
I know, just make sure no one enters the casino with vests, radios or uniforms. We can't have any mistakes.
Copy that. How's the stakeout going?
Well, so far it's like watching bad porn.
I just don't get these two idiots. They're born into money. They graduated good schools. Their daddies paid for it all.
Sounds like you've got an issue with rich people.
No. I got an issue with rich kids killing poor kids.
Can you tell us what you did after you had been ejected for the second time?
I hooked up with another buyer. Paid him to buy up Brenda's whole table. He dropped off the merchandise around 11... and I blissed out in my room for the rest of the night.
Holed up in your hotel room with a bunch of women's panties is not an alibi.
If you'd ever tried it, you'd know it was.
[to Catherine] I always thought that I was... you know, better alone, you know? But I miss having someone to come home to. [after few seconds] I didn't mean to put you on the spot. Just wanted you to know.
My uncle was obsessed with the smell of chocolate chip cookies. One day, my aunt came home and found him with his head in the oven. Thought he was committing suicide. She realised at that instant, the secret to a happy marriage: fresh baked cookies every day.
You're really kind of freaky, doc.
Coming from you, I'll take that as a compliment.
And, uh, you can tell Homeland Security that the quantity of radioactive material in this is infinitesimal and poses no threat.
Oh, you can tell them. Hang on a second. No. If-if the radiation source is infinitesimal, why are you wearing three lead aprons?
Despite my aversion to children, sperm count.
Wendy [to Hodges]: That's what you're doing, you're lying to children?
It's a teaching exercise.
It's an exercise in self-love.
Just play along and be a role model, please?
Uh, no. Why would I play along with you?
Because if you can't even imagine yourself out in the field, how will you ever expect Ecklie to?
So why lie?
I guess I'm afraid that maybe I'm gonna wake up one morning and I'm gonna think that I spent most of my life fighting crime in a test tube.
Just because something is the size of a molecule doesn't mean that it can't be filled with intrigue and excitement. CSIs gather the evidence, but analysis is really what gives it meaning. You need both to find the truth.
You see, Wendy suspected what I was up to, and she was urging me to come clean. I swear, it'll never happen again. Mea culpa. [to Henry] Can you forgive me?
[to Hodges] This is going to go on your permanent record. [to Henry] You got your confession. Happy?
Hmm.
Nobody likes a snitch.
David [walking in the sewer to get the body]: I think I bumped into every piece of dog poop and used condom in the city of Las Vegas.
Oh, David, suck it up. [sees the body] There he is.
Yep, he's dead.
David, you think you have a hard job?
Well, Officer, I am the one who has to haul him out of here.
Okay, let me get this straight, you'd rather do the legwork on a next-of-kin notification you'd rather do that than slog around in the sewer looking for evidence? I mean, that-that is not the down and dirty Sara Sidle I used to know.
I like to know where haters come from.
A racist gets stabbed before he can drown. A lot of people would call that justice.
We still have to call it murder.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's CSI: Crime Scene Investigation pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
