CSI: Crime Scene Investigation quotes

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Season 6

Brass:Let me tell you my story. Once upon a time, you follow your husband to a trailer park. You see him slumming with his little trailer bunny. You waited for him to come out...
[Flashback to, trailer door opens, Robert Durgee steps out. Amber sits in her car watching him. He lights his cigarette, suddenly car lights glare at him and tires screech as the car surges toward him]
Brass:When she pulls the body back in, before she can call for help, you torch the place. Kaboom. The end.
Amber Durgee: That's the craziest thing I've ever heard
Brass [laughs]: Wouldn't even make my top ten.

Catherine: It's a big desert.
Grissom: About twenty-five thousand square miles
Catherine: Nearest town is Pahrump. That's about thirty miles from here
Grissom: But I got water, we can share.
Catherine: Who are you today, Moses?
Catherine: [on phone] Yeah, Jim. Uh, Grissom and I are gonna take a little walk.

Catherine: So I understand that you're going up against Mark Thayer? The guy's an ass.
Grissom: Used to be a competent scientist. We actually co-authored a paper together ten years ago. I believe greed has gotten in his way.
Catherine: Well, I've seen him on the stand. He manipulates evidence.
Grissom: He manipulates people. The public assumes that scientists are ethical. But many of us are no better than politicians, evidently.

David: It's like the Red Sea in here.
Grissom: The Red Sea's not red, David.
David: No, it's blue from afar and transparent when held in hand, like any other body of water. I was just speaking figuratively.

Grissom: The Orionid meteor shower. You never get a view like this in town.
Brass: Hmm. So, uh, is this part of the investigation?
Grissom: No. But we're here, and it's beautiful.

Grissom: Well, it's always good to know what you don't know.

Hodges: All the hairs lifted off the victim's clothes were consistent with each other. There's a sample under the scope. The root is shaped like a spade which is indicitative of canine. The scale pattern is consistent with a golden retriever.
Sara: Oh, yeah the victims have a golden retriever.
Hodges: Well if you cracked that mystery at the scene, you would have saved me a lot of time. [sighs] I've been working like a dog.
Nick: You know studies have found that pet owners have lower stress levels, you should, you should check that out.
Hodges: Well, I had a hamster when I was growing up. My mother hated them she said they stank out my room. But I just loved to watch them spinning on their little wheels. One day I came home and they were gone. Somehow they'd gotten out of their cage.
Sara: How much did your mother hate them?
Hodges: They ran away.

Nick: Are you baggin' Z's right now, man?
Hodges: I was just having the greatest dream.
Warrick: You were out.
Hodges: It was the 80's and I had this Don Johnson beard, you know, the Miami Vice stubble. It just gave me this air of danger. My lady loved it.

Nick: Hey, Grissom. You wanna talk to me?
Grissom: Yeah. Sit down. (pause) I heard that, uh, Kelly Gordon may be a suspect in your murder case.
Nick: Yeah.
Grissom: Is that a problem?
Nick: No. No, it's not a problem. Hey, by the way I heard the tape. I did a voice comparison. Sylvia Mullins is the other voice on that tape. She's Walter Gordon's ex-business manager so I'm pretty sure she had something to do with my kidnapping.
Grissom: But now she's dead.
Nick: Yeah.
Grissom: So... it's over.
Nick: Yeah.
Grissom: Good.
Nick: Good.

Robbins: You know, Gil, we're all intrigued by our nightmares when we watch freak shows, but basically we're all thinking the same thing.
Grissom: Yeah, I'm glad they're not looking at me.

Sara: Any good news, Mandy?
Mandy: A little bit. Male DB at the bunker matched your partial from the kitchen door. So far he's the only one with a record. Matthew Dickens, 19, bust for petty theft.
Sara: College student
Mandy: Yeah, very impressionable. When I start my religion, that's where I'm gonna recruit.
[Sara gives her a weird look]

Sara: Can I talk to you for a minute?
Nick: Sure, what's up?
Sara: I-I think I need to talk about what happened at the station.
Nick: Oh, yeah.
Sara: I'm slightly concerned about its effect on the case, but more than that, I'm concerned about the case's effect on you, Nick, and I'm absolutely sure that, six months ago, you wouldn't have lost it like that.
Nick: I know, I'm sorry. I apologize for that.

Sara: Everything in our experience tells us they're dead.. all four of them.
Nick: Doesn't mean we just give up.
Sara: No one's giving up. It's just that... you're acting like you're gonna rescue a person, not recover a body. And on this job that's not usually the case.
Nick: I was rescued.
Sara: It was not your day to die. When it's your day, it's your day. You know?
Nick: I don't think it was Cassie's day.

Sofia: Your broadcast was for a blue Pontiac. Patrol figured this was worth a look.
Grissom: How bad does a smell have to get before Parking Control calls Homicide?
Sara: No way this car was at the trailer park. Think we've got a new case. First citation was issued five days ago. Car's probably been here at least six. [Sofia pops the trunk. Inside are the liquefied remains of two bodies] Six days in the summer heat.
Grissom: And a trunk becomes a crockpot.

Warrick: What's a 4-5-0?
Karen: That would be sex with a dead body.