CSI: Crime Scene Investigation quotes

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'Nick: Shut up. She was not.
Warrick: I saw her in action.
Nick: Really?
Warrick: Yeah, she was.
Nick: Catherine?
Catherine: (walks in and smiles) I was what?
Warrick: I was just telling Nick how you were a big bully in high school.
Catherine: A bully? All right, I guess I was. But, I mean, not the kind that people want to take a gun out and shoot.
Warrick: No.
Nick: No, no. You were the kind that guys fall all over themselves trying to impress.
Catherine: (smiling) Like you, Nick, huh? (Cath puts a hand on his shoulder for emphasis, he gets it. And sits down) Oh, Nick...what were you in high school?
Nick: Me? I was, uh...I was "dependable".
Catherine: Dependable.
Nick: Mmhmm.
Catherine: Dependable jock, dependable stoner?
Nick: No. Never a strap, never a smoker. Just all-around "dependable" guy, I guess.
Warrick: What Nick's trying to say he was unpopular. (Cath laughs. Sara walks into the break room)
Sara: Nick, Ronny's got something on Liquid Man, says it's hot.
Nick: Great. (gathers things and gets up)
Warrick: Hey Sara, what were you in high school?
Sara': Science nerd. (Nick walks past her and sniffs)
Nick: You changed? (whispers) But you still smell. Let's go. (they leave)
Catherine: So that leaves you, Warrick. What were you?
Warrick: Oh, I was short, I had big feet, thick glasses.
Catherine: You?
Warrick: Yeah. I got pushed around by all the guys and never got any play from the girls.
Catherine: The girls didn't even notice your eyes?
Warrick: No, they used to tease me about my eyes. Called me names.
Catherine: Aww, well, what do they know? They're your best feature.
(Sara is working on the decomp and Hank finds her in the lab, and she excuses herself for a minute)

Brass: [to a suspect] Newsflash, sweetheart. You can't make a deal if you keep your mouth shut.

Brass: Who said the shooter was scared?
Grissom: Shot him in the back.
Brass: With his zipper down and his hands otherwise engaged.
Grissom: Yeah. We're looking for a coward.

Catherine: [to Grissom] Is this part of the Sherlock Holmes Fan Club Kit?

Catherine: Fluorescent powders?
Sara: Ye, why not, they're in the kit.
Catherine: Protocol's black.
Sara: Since when do you care about my choice of powders?
Catherine: Assistant coroner is four hours late and we are stuck out here until he transports the body and I haven't even heard from Grissom.
Sara: You know I've never tried green.
Catherine: I should never have been sent to this remote scene in the first place I've got seniority, I deserve no, I've earned the right to pick my cases.
[Sara hands her a candy bar]
Catherine: If I start eating I will shut up.
Sara: Do you have a mirror?
Catherine: Since when do you care about your appearance?... I mean at a crime scene.
Sara: It's not for me.

Catherine: Hey, coffee boy. Where's my DNA? Cigarette butt? Match book time-delay device? Hair spray? Any of this sound familiar?
'Greg: Bags under the eyes, coffee cups, stress face. Any of this look familiar? I'm working on it.
Catherine: Did Grissom put his stuff in front of mine?
(Catherine is walking by DNA)

Catherine: Hey, I just talked to your partner. Working this case without me, huh?
Nick: Hmm?
Catherine: Greg Sanders?
Nick: Leggo my Greggo. He's a CSI wannabe. Please.

Catherine: I just realized that you and I have a very healthy relationship.
Grissom: We do?
Catherine: When we have a problem, I don't paint Greg in latex and stick a straw up his nose.
Grissom: Good. He'd probably like it.
Catherine: You're supposed to say something revealing back to me.
Grissom: Okay. I never told anyone this, Catherine......
[screen fades to black]

Catherine: Naked kid under a blanket at his shrink's late at night and his mother's there.
Greg: Your case just entered a whole new dimension of weird.

Catherine: No one can predict more than a few seconds into the future.
Nick: I predict I'll still be standing here one minute from now.
Warrick: Where are we going with this?
Grissom: Paige was in her dorm room and then ended up in the dumpster. Somewhere between her dorm room and the dumpster is our answer. That's where we're going. Coming, Nick?
Warrick: [to Nick] Nice try, Nostradamus.

Catherine: Pucks, bucks and... chicks.

Catherine: So how's your new toy working out?
Warrick: It's been downsized.
Catherine: Bummer. I know how you wanted to see that thing work.
Warrick: Well, it's the same difference, really. Air is drawn into the last tube the chalk absorbs the chemicals from the air. And mass spec will break it down at the lab.
Catherine: So why did you need the expensive one in the first place?
Warrick: 'Cause it was cool. (Cath smiles at his honesty)

Catherine: So I suppose you believe in Santa Claus?
Nick: After this... oh yeah.

Catherine: What's the matter with you?
Nick: I'm on a case.
Catherine: We're on a case.
Nick: Right...

Catherine: Who is this?
Brass: It's Braun's squeeze. She's an ex-stripper too. Perhaps you two met in a professional capacity.
Catherine: And, uh, where has she been the past 12 hours?
Brass: Uh, let's see. [he pulls out his notebook] Quote: "Out." Endquote.