Sorry for the delay, it's a paparazzi jungle downstairs.
Yeah, well Doc Robbins isn't the only one with a scrapbook.
S8 E16Two and a Half Deaths
(about Annabelle) Y'know, it's a tragic coincidence that she died two days after you qualified for half of what she's worth.
BBud
Really? I thought that was the bright side.
Then the rubber chicken was inserted port-mortem.
And thus not the cause of death.
Might have been a gag. Sorry.
(Hodges has been doing tests on the absorption of tampons)
That time of the month, huh? I know, picking out the right feminine product can be so hard.
You're gonna mock me or help me?
I have to choose?
I can't get this to work!
Well that's probably 'cause you don't have the right equipment. ... You don't, do you?
Haha, you're lucky you're cute. Annabelle Fundt was dosing her tampons with vodka.
Does that even work?
Kinda, even at their most absorbent, tampons only hold about 19 grams of fluid or about 20 milliliters.
Well, that's enough for aunt flow but that is not going to get an alcoholic drunk.
Who's Aunt flow? (Wendy gives him a look) Oh! All right, maybe she was just doing it to take the edge off but what I can't figure out is how she managed it because every time I throw one in here, it turns into Spongebob Squarepants.
You don't take it out of the applicator first. Gimme! (Hodges gives her a tampon) Watch and learn. (she makes it clear how it works) There, that's why they call it an applicator.
I always wondered how that worked.
All men do.
[about a bloodstain] Hey, what does this look like to you?
Hermaphrodite on rollerskates.
A puppy.
Bud didn't marry Annabelle. He married Natasha pretending to be Annabelle.
Well, one thing's for sure. Neither one of them is pretending to be dead.
BBud
Whoa, hey! Easy on the Emmy there buddy.
Is that what this is?
Looks like a comedy writer came out of the closet.
I doubt if it's the first time.
So, that's it. Robot-man, closet-stalker-guy gets his package grabbed and a TV star dies.
It is the classic story.
Forget it Gil. It's Burbank.
S8 E17For Gedda
Crime scene at a funeral. Can't get much deader than this.
What if the killer used the victim's car to transport the body?
He drives the victim's own vehicle back to the funeral home, stuffs the body in a double-decker coffin, hits a car wash, comes back cleans out the office, and then leaves us the keys. That's pretty considerate.
Or very smart.
Nick (after Hodges was talking to I.A): I don't care, what'd you say?
I said that I saw Warrick sitting alone in Grissom's office in the dark.
So what?
He got a phone call and he got really pissed at the person that he was talking to.
So what?
Then he was found an hour later in a pool of Gedda's blood.
Hey, you don't know what happened in there.
Look, Nick, all I did was tell the truth as I saw it. That's what we're supposed to do, right?
IWI.A. Officer Wagenbach
(to Warrick; laying out photos in front of him) Your gun with blood tissue and hair at the scene. Your cuffs, on the vic. You covered in blood. You went to Pigalle to get revenge by giving Lou Gedda a taste of his own medicine. You're a CSI, what's the evidence telling you?
(pauses) The evidence is ... the evidence is suggesting that I did it.
S9 E1For Warrick
[arriving at Warrick's crime scene] Gil, how do you wanna handle this?
I want us to do this, Conrad. I want Nick and Catherine on the car.
[softly] Okay.
I feel sorry for whoever did this.
[finishes her phone call and walks over to Grissom and Ecklie] Greg's coming back from the airport, I told him to go straight to the lab. (pauses) We're gonna have to take your clothes to get processed.
I'll drive ya.
I'm gonna go with Warrick.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's CSI: Crime Scene Investigation pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.