(Steve and Roger walk in on Stan as he hangs himself)
Oh my God! Dad!
Wait, he's still breathing. Stan, are you trying to kill yourself or thrill yourself?
S4 E17Every Which Way But Lose
S4 E18Weiner of Our Discontent
[to Roger] Here's the parent company. Here's the subsidiary. Here's the branch of Food Co that presides over Hotdog Hauss. Here's Hotdog Hauss. Here's East Central Division. Here's this warehouse and this tiny little spot here is you.
Anyone get a boner when Akiko slapped me? [he stands up and walks past a table of girls, hunched over] You know what's also funny? Walking like a gorilla?
S4 E19Daddy Queerest
[drunk] Francine, you need to come home right now. Greg was mean to me!
TBTank Bates
What're you talking about, fruit loop? She's Terry's girlfriend.
No she's not. She's my wife! Greg is Terry's boyfriend!
TBTank Bates
...What?
Terry and Greg are in love! Your son is gay!
[Terry faints in an overly-cliched manner. his father, confused, catches him]
See? That's not how a straight guy faints. This is how a straight guy faints!
[collapses forward and lands flat on his face]
Why did you do that?
Do what? Test the ax that could save our lives in a fire?
What up, you ass-face bitches? You stupid-ass honky-fuckin' faggots?**
Roger (cheerfully): Well, hello, potty-mouth.
S4 E20Stan's Night Out
Go Biscuit! [the dog hits the wall] Okay, go Cheesers! [mouse runs away] Coward!
SSaunders
Hey, come on! Dick! Don't! Dick. Come on, Dick. Why are you doing this, Dick? This isn't you. I want the old Dick back. I don't want bad new Dick. I want good old Dick. Give me the Dick I'm used to. Give me the Dick I love.
BBernie
Hello, line one. You're on with Bernie.
CCaller
You son of a bitch. I'm gonna kill you.
[Bernie's eyes widen. Reveal that Stan is calling Bernie as he's having dinner in front of the TV]
I'm gonna finish this meatloaf, get on a plane to Toronto and shoot you in your lying face.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's American Dad! pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.