Sharon Carter quotes from Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place

Sharon

All right girls, let's hit the cages.

Oh, I don't feel like dancing.

Sharon

The batting cages.

Sharon

You expect me to play with a team of chicks?

Hey squirt, three of us play for Boston College.

I play for Florida State.

And I play the main stage at 'Topless Topless Topless'.

Berg

I have a dream...a dream where women are free to roam all fields, not just right...but center, left, and yes -- even shortshop.

Sharon

Even pitcher?

Berg

Sorry, kitten -- that's man's work.

Pete

Why aren't you at work.

Sharon

It's toxic Awareness day?

Pete

I've known this woman for five months now and Berg thinks he can just waltz right in there and close the deal.

Berg

I object! Close the deal? I would like to apologise for his attitude towards women.

Sharon

Right. This coming from a guy with a VIP card at 'Topless, Topless, Topless'.

Berg

They have an excellent wine list.

Sharon

Just because Pete brings her pizza doesn't mean he's delivering the sausage.

Berg

I never...want to forget you said that.

Berg

After you have a drink with us.

Sharon

I can't drink.

Berg

Then why are you in college?

Sharon

What about this one?

Pete

Hooker.

Sharon

High class or street?

Pete

Jerry Springer.

Sharon

Berg, there's nothing wrong with being number two. I mean just as many people remember the second man on the moon, Captain, uh, what's his face.

Berg

Yeah, well, your chemical company destroys the planet.

Sharon

True, but we're number one at it.

Pete

You da Bomb!

Sharon

Where did he learn that?!

Berg

I just, don't know!

Berg

What is wrong with you?

Sharon

I'm sorry, this is how we play. When one of us is down, ya kick em!

Sharon

I hate my gym, all it is is a disgusting meat market. They lure men into joining by putting all the Silicon Sallies by the window so they can ogle them.

Pete

You didn’t make the window again, huh?

Sharon

No, third row.

Sharon

What happened to your hand?

Berg

I was so upset about the whole thing with Nicole that I punched a mailbox causing me physical pain and a possible federal crime.

Sharon

That’s the best you could come up with?

Berg

It’s better than ‘I was so upset I wrapped my hand in this bandage.’

Johnny

Unlike you I’m proud of what I do.

You’re not happy being a stripper?

Johnny

Tommy!

Sharon

You told him I was a stripper?

Sorry, ‘exotic dancer.’

Sharon

And when it rains he gives me his jacket.

Rick gives me his jacket too.

Sharon

Yeah but Johnny isn’t an alcoholic.