Homer Simpson quotes from The Simpsons

Homer

Come on, you can't look at that infinitely dense little guy and not want to feed it something.

Homer

Marge, I was just being a good husband by pretending to agree with you while secretly undermining your agenda.

Homer

Geez. I mean I'm no Luis Guzmán, but I'm alright.

Homer

[plugs Marge's ears, talks quieter] One onion rings, please.

Homer

And I don't think you're boring. It's just that in today's multi-channel environment you have too many choices. Look at Sunday night! There's like eight amazing shows, none of them on Fox.

Homer

Happy Anni...birth...tine's...shark week?

Homer

[saddened] Oh, what I wouldn't give for an anvil to fall on me. [an anvil falls on him] D'oh!

Homer

A paper-based read-a-ma-jig? What are we, cavemen?

Homer

Free Tibet! You heard me, free him now!

Homer

"Hope"? Is this one of those coincidences, like Jesus on a tortilla or George Washington on a dollar bill?

Homer

No one judges my wife's thunder bags.

Homer

Wearing scarves in non-scarf weather is the essence of cool.

Homer

Beat it, ducks! I'm not old enough to have food for you. I'm sexy. Young and sexy!

Homer

Well, that's just how dogs are. The most disloyal, unfaithful creatures God ever made.

Homer

That's right, your lord sticks his hand in his pants. And yes, it is the same hand I tapped you with.