So when you moving to Milwaukee?
LipI don't know.
You don't sound very excited about it.
Lip
Yeah, well... it is Milwaukee. Free house, though, right? Yeah, I mean, it's a nice house. Nice neighborhood. Yard. Well, damn. Jackpot. Saw an actual birdhouse with birds in it. Uh, not drսg. Birds.
So, how's your dad? You know, don't think he's gonna be my best man.
Lip
Hey, what's up, punk? Ready for school?
Can't go to school until Frank signs a form.
Lip
What form?
Just drop out. I can't drop out. I'm ten.
Lip
Give it to me. I'll sign it.
Lip
I can fake Frank's signature.
School says that he has to sign it in person.
Well, you know where Frank is?
Living with some lady up in Glencoe. He drives a Rolls Royce.
Lip
Unbelievable!
Oh, good for him. Anyone want to go with me?
LILip, Ian and Mickey
No.
Who's wearing the white tux?
Gonna be a stressful day.
Frank walking you down the aisle?
Great. I hope he stays there.
Lip
Hey. I gotta go out for a bit. You take your meds yet? It's gonna be a stressful day.
Lip
All right. Hey, we gotta meet at the Bamboo Lotus at two for photos.
Hey, how much did these tuxes cost?
Um, Mickey rented them at some fancy place downtown.
Lip
Where's Mickey getting all the money for this?
FMFlashback Mickey
[Bursts into a room full of underwear-clad women in a drug operation] On the floor, mοthеrfսckеr!
I don't really wanna know.
Father Pete marrying you?
Father Pete's Catholic. Pope won't let him marry gay people.
But Father Pete's gay. Lives in the rectory with the organist with the nipple ring.
Wait. The organist at Saint Sebastian's got a nipple ring?
Reverend Sally's doing the ceremony. She's Episcopalian. They'll marry anybody.
[Referring to shoes Liam is holding] Yeah, those are nice, right?
Mm-hmm. [Mickey and Ian kiss]
[Lip and Tami are woken up by Freddie]
Lip
Oh, no, no. Let him cry. He's teething. [Tami groans] The hell does he need teeth for anyway?
Lip
We could drug him.
Break up a downer or something.
Lip
Frank used to rub whiskey on our gums. [Tami laughs] Then he'd dump us in the tub.
Lip
Not always.
[Sighs] I think I'm gonna die. [Lip laughs] Can you die from lack of sleep? Oh, my God. Okay. [Gets up and pats Lip's leg] I'll get him. You start coffee.
[Knocking on bedroom doors] My birthday! Wake up! Wake up! I'm five!
Lip
[Franny comes down stairs] Hey, hey. Look who it is. The birthday girl.
[Sniffles, sighs] Presents?
Lip
Oh, no, no. It's not like Christmas, Franny. You're gonna get your presents tonight at your party. Oh. Hey. [Picks up Franny and carries her to kitchen] Come on. Let's go make some breakfast, huh? Whoof! Go sit! Yo, what up?
Why'd you guys sleep here last night?
Lip
Oh, the fumes at our new place from resurfacing the bathtub.
Good morning, Franny. Happy birthday.
Lip
These up for grabs?
Lip
Why?
I'm gonna sell them for cheap to the lunch debt kids.
Lip
What's a lunch debt kid?
Kids who run out of money on their food account. Can't eat the hot lunch till they pay up.
Lip
Is that even legal? Don't public schools have to feed the kids?
Yeah, but the lunch lady serves them gross shit like stale bread, government cheese, chunky pudding.
Lip
So you're capitalizing on the misfortunes of others by selling them your peanut butter sandwiches?
The American way. See you.
Hey, there's my sweet birthday princess! Who is five today?!
I don't know! She looks like a big girl. Did you grow overnight? Are you sure you're not 15?
Are you excited for your princess party?
I'm with Frans on this one.
Hey, hey, hey, birthday Franny. Hey, look what I got you from work. They let us keep stuff if it's past its expiration date. There's so much stuff that just gets thrown away into a dumpster.
Oh, great job, man. Free old cereal.
[Carl comes in door] 5-0!
Lip
Oh, fuck, it's the cops!
Hey, I'm unarmed! Don't shoot!
Ha, ha, ha, very funny, assholes. Now, if you'll excuse me, Imma go load these bad boys up with armor-piercing rounds so I can keep the mean streets safe for fuck-heads like you guys. Watch out, Chicago! You're going down!
Oh, my God! Again with the back splatter?
Lip
Backsplash.
[Scoffs] So, um... any interest in brunch?
Lip
[Sighs] Are we brunch people now?
An old teacher of mine invited us.
Lip
[Grunts] You're friends with an old teacher?
Uh, Mr. Hanisian. He just moved back from St. Louis.
Lip
I don't know. Wasting the rest of the morning eating pastries with some old dude who taught you, what, pre-algebra? History? Creative writing?
Lip
Oh. Great, maybe he can teach us how to play "Hot Cross Buns" on the recorder.
Lip
Brunch is a scam. You know that, right? Marketers literally just made up a fourth meal, and we're all supposed to go along with it?
Okay. Well, he really wanted to meet you, but I'll just tell him that you're too big of an asshole to come. [Walks away]
[Lip and Brad are breaking into their motorcycle repair shop with Mickey]
Fuck! Darker than Satan's asshole in here.
Lip
All right, Imma hit parts. Mick, grab some bikes, and, uh, Brad, office.
Wait, why are you using real names?
Lip
Hey, relax, we're gonna take the security camera.
And what- what if they bugged the place?
Hey, Mission Impossible, less talking, more stealing. What the fuck is this shit?
Hey, hey, three grand in the safe.
Lip
Yo, hey, hey. Fuck that one. It's a piece of shit. Grab some chrome pipes and carburetors, parts room.
Shit feels expensive. It's heavy.
Lip
[Mickey drops objects smashing it] Hey, what the fuck you doing?!
Making it look like Mexicans broke in!
Fucking freezing in here. Why'd you get a refrigerated truck?
Lip
'Cause, Brad, there's not a lot of options last-minute.
Where we fencing this shit?
Lip
I don't know. Out of state, probably.
Wait, you haven't lined up a fence yet?
Lip
No.
Great fucking plan, Lip. Which one of you geniuses came up with it?
Lip
Well, it was a group effort: me, Brad, couple of six-packs.
Couple of s- You off the wagon again?
Lip
Yeah, just one night.
"Just one night", isn't that what every alcoholic says?
DDetainee
Psst! You wanna watch me jerk off?
Lip
Thanks, but fuck no. [Police sergeant enters] Hey, you got any updates on what's goin' on?
PSPolice sergeant
When the detectives are ready for you, they'll let ya know.
Lip
All right, could I get a sandwich or somethin'?
PSPolice sergeant
Legally don't gotta provide any food, 'cause legally you're not under arrest.
Lip
All right, so legally, I can just go.
PSPolice sergeant
Sure, but you try to leave, they probably will arrest you and bring you right back in. [Lip exhales]
Lip
See, I was at home with my lady and my kid. All right? She'll vouch for me. The kid, he can't talk yet, but if he could, he'd say Daddy was home all night.
MMale detective
[Tosses binder on table] We have your juvenile arrest records, okay? So you can drop the choir boy act.
Lip
No, you see, tha- that's the old me, all right? I'm reformed now. I'm sober, even. You know, I'm not sayin' I'm a saint but, uh, I'm a family man, makin' an honest living.
FFemale detective
Okay, asshole, we know that you were involved with the robbery, so you can either cooperate, or we can make you cooperate.
Lip
All right, first of all, if you knew I was involved in the robbery, I'd be in cuffs right now, and second of all, I am cooperating. What am I doing if I'm not cooperating?
MMale detective
Look, make it easy on yourself. Tell us where the bikes are, who helped you, and maybe we can recommend you avoid doin' real time.
Lip
Hey, can I go? [Gets up and leaves interrogation room]
Lip
What the fuck?! Who fixed the drywall?
Someone fixed the drywall. [Scoffs] Not it.
So that means we're not selling the house, right?
Lip
Did you do this?
Did I repair the damage that some dumbfuck did to my kitchen? Yeah.
Lip
What's your problem?
My problem? You're the one who's mentally unstable.
Lip
What, 'cause I want to sell the house?
Yes! It's driving all of us crazy. I mean, Liam, am I right?
For real. Are we selling the house or not?
Lip
Yes!
This is why I haven't pooped in three days.
Yeah, and I had sex with a gay guy. And now I probably have AIDS. So thanks a lot, Lip.
Lip
How is it my fault that you had sex with a gay guy?
...
We are not selling the house.
Lip
We are selling the house, all right?! Everybody got that?! No more conversations, no more bullshit, we're selling the fuckin' house! Let's go.
Still probably don't have AIDS. Everybody's on PrEP.
Well, I'm sure I have something.
Well, syphilis, maybe. Gonorrhea. Lots of that going around.
Ah, relax. That's like saying you walked on the beach and you have sand between your toes. Should probably hit a clinic, though.
Lip
Hey.
You stay up all night again?
Lip
Indeed, I have, Officer.
Yeah, I'm an officer, but what does that even mean? All I see is lazy cops who do nothing or hard-ass cops who don't give a shit about the community. It's like I don't wanna be either one of those, so what's the point?
Lip
What?
Lip
No, no. Look, I'm sorry, man, I do, I wanna listen to you, but could we do it another time? My brain can't switch gears right now.
[Walks away] That's fine.
[Comes down stairs] Jesus... loud! Early!
Lip
Yeah, well, I gotta try and get this finished.
[Entire cast is sitting on door steps of Gallagher residence]
We’re not doing this, telling you what happened on Shameless last week anymore. We’re sick of it.
Lip
Yeah, we quit.
It insults your intelligence.
They don’t pay us enough.
What, they pay you guys for this?
[They all turn heads to Kevin] Yeah. You don’t get paid?
Well, fuck me! [They all snicker]
[Ian pulse checks an unresponsive Frank on the couch] Is he dead?
Grampy went tinkle in his pants.
Ugh, damn it. Not on the new couch.
[Walks up] Hey, what’s goin’ on?
How much heroin did he do?
Lip
Yet another disadvantage to decades of copious narcotics use.
Should we, like, call the paramedics or something?
Lip
No, he’s done this before a bunch of times.
He may be trying to kill himself. He’s been depressed. The dementia’s getting bad.
Hand me that syringe. [Ian hands her one and she pricks Frank's hand]
Or he’s already brain-dead. That happens with overdoses.
I guess it’s up to us to finish him off. Quick so*t to the head, dump his body in the lake. I don’t think anybody’s gonna miss him. What? We’d just be helpin’ Mr. Fuckup finish the job.
HHeidi
You could pillow him. That’s what my dad did to my grandpa so we could sell his double-wide. Couldn’t afford his oxygen refills anymore.
Lip
Debbie’s got a new friend.
HHeidi
Hey, you check his pockets, see if he got any money on him?
Shameless · 903 quotes
