[Grabs Frank's hand and leads him to a cellar] Come on, Frankie, follow me. Come on. [She lifts a blanket from a guitar case]
FrankA stash?
[Opens guitar] Wrong. [Guitar case reveals shotgun, masks and other robbery paraphenalia] Ta-da.
Frank
I was kind of hoping for cocaine.
Oh, we're gonna get all the cocaine we want with these. [Hands Frank a shotgun]
Frank
We're gonna sell 'em?
No, we're gonna use 'em. Frank, I want to write a will... I don't have anything solid to leave the kids.
Frank
Those kids don't need an inheritance. It'll ruin 'em.
[Produces a notebook] Look, I lifted this from my old dealer, Eric. He had a plan to rub a police evidence room and get off with the drugs and the cash.
Frank
How much cash?
Eh, those aces hold like 75 to 100 grand. If we get off with half, we're golden, Frankie. Wouldn't it be great to be outlaws together again?
Frank
We could just get wasted together again.
No, remember all the thrills we had when we were kids? When I used to lure guys into the hotel and lock the bathroom door so we could run off with their wallets and drugs?
Frank
Sweet bird of youth.
Yes. [Starts pouring out a vial of cocaine onto thumb] Look, I want to leave each kid five grand so they can get a good start in life. Will you help me make amends, Frankie? Want some?
Frank
Yeah.
Frank
[Pouring out stolen goods on table] Oh. Motel orgy loot.
Frank, give Debbie a wallet. Or better yet, give her a ring. For their wedding.
Aww, that is so romantic. I lost mine years ago.
Frank
Let's see how this one looks on you, my love. I think it's a real diamond.
Wow. I wonder how much Raoul's gonna give us for it. We can't sell this.
Frank
Why not? It's the best of the bunch.
Frank
No. It fits like a glass slipper. That should never leave your finger. Monica Jean Darrgen...
Frank
Will you marry me?
But what about getting money for the kids?
Frank
Let's give the kids something more valuable than money. An example of real love.
And then we'll go back to work tomorrow?
Frank
Sure. Today we proclaim how we feel before God and the whole world.
Pretty sure the whole world doesn't care.
Pretty sure God doesn't either.
Frank
Will you make me the happiest man in the world?
Frank
Come on.
Frank
[Appears in family room] Monica's dead.
Frank
[Sits on couch] What's with the outfit?
Frank
Is that Monica's stuff?
Frank
You're going through her stuff? What the hell is this? [Picks up key off coffee table]
Some key to an old apartment.
Frank
36 and Racine. That's that storage place. 36th and Racine. The shitty one that they stuck in the old Buick dealership.
Monica had a storage unit?
Frank
This is it.
Why don't we just use the front door, Frank?
Frank
Too many cameras out there. There's only one camera over the gate here. The 2884 on the key must be the code to open the gate.
What the hell is going on, Frank?
Frank
Your mother told me she had something valuable for you kids but that it might be dangerous to try to retrieve it.
Frank
Hard to say.
On a scale of one to ten?
Frank
Said the DEA could be involved.
The Drug Enforcement Agency?
Frank
Come on.
Frank
Debs, how old are you?
Frank
Too risky, the Feds could prosecute you as an adult. Carl?
Frank
Really? You seem younger. Liam, you know your numbers?
Frank
Oh, he won't do serious time if shit goes down. Come here. Looky here. You see that little black box? It's got numbers on it, just like on a telephone. Go punch in 2884. What're you looking at them for? Go. It's okay. Go, go, go.
[Frank, Debbie, Carl and Liam are sneaking along into the storage unit facility and come upon their unit door]
Frank
[Whispers] Get back. It may be booby-trapped.
Jesus, was she living here?
If she was, she was living here with a dude.
Frank
Holy shit.
Frank
[Picks up sewing box and opens it to reveal several bags of meth] Your inheritance.
Frank
Hi, I'm Frank Gallagher. I'm here to make amends. In 1995, I think I broke into your house and stole your TV.
OWOld woman
I didn't live here in 1995.
Frank
Really?
Frank
Could've been, '96? Did anyone ever try to rob you?
OWOld woman
Woke up to a guy trying to climb in bed with me once.
Frank
No. That wasn't me. Wait, did you used to be a redhead?
Frank
Aldo.
Frank
I'm here to make amends. January 1989. You and I were under the freight tracks.
AAldo
Jesus, Frank, '89? We'll be here till Christmas. Get to the more recent shit.
Frank
Really?
AAldo
How about the shit the statute of limitations hasn't run out on yet?
Frank
How long is that?
AAldo
Seven years for everything except murder and kidnapping.
Frank
All right, um... November 2010. We were at 63rd Street Beach doing glue. Mad Dog and you had blacked out. I had shit my pants, so I stole yours.
Frank
Yeah.
AAldo
You're a fucking asshole.
Frank
Don't I know it. January 2011. Remember that little dog you used to have?
[Enters kitchen] Smells good. I like Corporal Carl in the kitchen.
Doesn't taste half bad, either.
[Referring to Lip's plate portion] Eating for two? A boy or a girl, huh? [Rubs Lip's belly]
I'm just trying to fight the urge to drink with extreme nausea.
Hey, I could try to move your meth today.
About time. I'll go get it.
Hey, it's not like there's an eBay for this. Shit takes time.
Frank
Yo, yo, yo. What up, homeboys? Lip, you're 21, right?
Frank
You're in the ballpark.
Frank
What would another 21-year-old wear to a- a job interview?
Well, a fucking 52-year-old who was in a delusional crack haze thinking he was 21 would wear the green shirt that doesn't belong to him.
Frank
I was gonna pick the same one. Young minds think alike.
What, are you looking to collect disability again, Frank?
Frank
That was the old Frank. This Frank is different. I wish you kids could've known me before Monica coiled her body around my neck, choked to death the man I was meant to be. You're about to witness the rebirth of a proactive member of society.
AMr. Adeeb
You don't have much in the way of work history.
Frank
Been a stay-at-home dad most of my life.
AMr. Adeeb
It says that you sold cars for a period of time.
Frank
Yes. Not in a lot or anything. These were cars I acquired.
AMr. Adeeb
Tell me about this, uh, recycling center you worked at.
Frank
[Chuckles] "Worked at" may be an overstatement. I collected cans.
AMr. Adeeb
And this Kroger's job you held for, what... [laughs] ...six hours, huh?
Frank
In the butcher department. Sliced my hand first day. I-I got disability.
AMr. Adeeb
Mr. Gallagher, it seems that you're not really interested in holding down a job, so why enter the, um, workforce at this age?
Frank
I lost my wife a few months ago.
AMr. Adeeb
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Frank
I'm not. What you are looking at, Mr. Adeeb, is a man who changed himself for the love of a bad woman. She turned me into a scoundrel. I found loopholes in the system. I skirted the man. I sent a big "eff you" to society. And now that she's dead, I'm-I'm ready to go back to who I was: an upstanding citizen, someone who respects community, a butterfly emerging from a chrysalis, forever changed. I pledge to you, Mr. Adeeb and to all the other members of this big fat marble we're on, I will never let a woman change who I am again.
AMr. Adeeb
[Inhales sharply and sighs]
Frank
You all right?
AMr. Adeeb
[Grunts, sighs] When I was at Harvard Med School, I... I fell in love with this... [sniffles] waitress at Legal Seafoods. Amy Schwartzman.
Frank
A Jew?
AMr. Adeeb
Mm. She wanted to move back to Chicago. So I quit school, followed her, proposed. She said yes, if I converted. So I took off the turban, cut my hair... and changed my name to Jerry.
Frank
Come on!
AMr. Adeeb
I was Jerry Singh-Schwartzman for 15 years.
Frank
Get out of here.
AMr. Adeeb
Now I'm divorced four months. I'm trying to... reclaim my old identity now. [Frank extends arm for a fistbump and Mr. Adeeb honors it]
Frank
Right on, brother. - Mm.
AMr. Adeeb
No one comes here and tells you the truth. Honesty's all you'll get from me. Then I want you on my team. I believe in second chances. Welcome to Lumber Lawn and Lighting, Mr. Gallagher.
Frank
I won't let you down.
Frank
You wanted to see me, boss?
AMr. Adeeb
Yes, please. Come in. Have a seat. I'm onto you.
Frank
Excuse me?
AMr. Adeeb
You're not interested in being a Lumber Lawn and Lighting employee, are you? [Frank is dreading] You're here to become management. [Frank becomes jovial] One step at a time, my friend. I'm impressed by your work ethic and your dedication. That's why I'm making you the Garden Department Supervisor. [They both laugh]
Frank
Okay.
Frank
Thank you.
AMr. Adeeb
Huh?! Yeah. [He extends arm and they fistbump] Ahh! Huh?!
[Ian and Carl are counting money on family room couch]
[Comes in] Monica's ex found us?
Yeah, he tried to drown me in my own hot tub. Ian and I got, like, nine grand between us. You got any money left?
Uh, no. Only a couple hundred. I had to pay off some debts. Debs?
Spent it all on equipment and welding school. I'm broke.
You have, uh, any idea what Fiona did with your meth?
Well, has somebody got a better idea? Something you can sell? I mean, someone you know that could loan us that kind of money?
Hey, Debs, how about Neil?
He literally just broke up with me. He said I'm a horrible person.
Frank
[Comes in holding something furry] Evening, family.
Frank
Roadkill, I'm afraid. I'll give him a proper burial tomorrow.
Frank
Indeed.
Frank, do you have any cash? We gotta pay this Eric guy, for real.
Frank
Of course. [Hands over cash wad]
Thanks. Seven fucking dollars?
We could rob where you work. Know where they keep the safe?
Frank
Absolutely not.
You're the one that got us into this shit, Frank.
Frank
Monica. Not me. And it's Francis now. I no longer resonate with a hard K.
EEric
Sweet Jesus. What is that smell? Ugh, God.
I... I have my hot tub. It's worth, like, four K. It's, like, 33,000 in all.
EEric
That's not enough. You still owe me 37 grand!
Frank
Stop, stop. Let me handle this, please. Eric, is it? You were Monica's partner, I take it? Which means half of the drugs belonged to her, and we have done all we can to pay you back for your half. That smell? That reek, Eric? That stench that's filling your nostrils? That's Monica. Dead, rotting, beautiful, tortured, magnificent, ridiculous, worm-infested Monica. She died. We watched her die. And then we put her in the ground. We buried some drugs with her, but that's neither here nor there. And then we dug her up. But two bags of meth... plus nine grand and a hot tub? That's all we've got. That's it. And now she's six feet under again. And if you come near my family, Eric, as God as my witness, I will bury you with her. Are we clear?
[Ian and Carl come in the door to kitchen]
Violating a veteran of the Armed Forces requires an immediate show of counterinsurgency. Shock and awe for those bitches.
[Hands Lip a flyer] Don't ask.
Fuck's a neighborhood watch?
A club of George Zimmerman-type of pussies who aren't trained for military action.
Oh, I think it's a group version of not minding your own business.
What? Sean? Sean?! He was here?!
Frank
Sun salutations, fruits of my loins. Am I hearing correctly? The Sean has returned?
Frank
This is a test of our family's spiritual growth. I forgive him and wish him peace on his journey.
How much longer are we gonna be putting up with St. Francis of the Southside?
Frank
Permanent life change is a daily practice, Lip. I've just entered my symbolic 30s and they require a new sense of maturity.
What happened to your symbolic 20s?
Frank
We grow up fast in the age of enlightenment.
That's great, so Frank's in his early 30s and I'm back in puberty. I'm getting a boner every morning and having to whack off.
No, it's part of the rules of sobriety. You know, I'm supposed to stay away from relationships... for a while.
Frank
Ooh, beware of rules, son. Real change happens when you reset your internal clock.
Thanks for the fatherly advice.
Frank
Your 30s are all about becoming a stand-up man. And learning to embrace fatherhood.
Too bad you're out of kids to screw up.
Frank
That's so not true. I've still got Liam. He's the only Gallagher who hasn't been ruined by that whirlwind known as Monica. And I'm going to parent him the way I should've been parenting all along, right, son? Let's get you to school on time. The first step in good parenting... Punctuality. Let's go.
BBeverly
Hey there, associate manager of the garden department.
Frank
Aha! Hey, hand me that little spade over there... Ah, heck, you know what? Never mind, forget it. I'm already covered in dirt.
BBeverly
Mrs. Seery told us about Liam's test. The parents have assembled a committee to eliminate cultural bias in standardized testing. We're petitioning Congress to support the Every Student Succeeds Act, and we're instituting a round table to open each exam question to multiple interpretations based on ethnic and economic considerations.
Frank
It's an excellent start, and I'm happy to lead the charge, although sometimes I feel like our journey is this big and a committee is this big.
BBeverly
Your hands... filthy.
Frank
Some employees like to wear gloves. I prefer the sensation of my bare hands in the moist soil.
BBeverly
Wish I could get laid someplace comfortable, like with a bed or... Show me your hands again. [Making love to Frank in the storeroom] Oh! Your fingernails are so dirty! Ah! Now tell me how much you made last year, without taxes.
Frank
I don't know. Two grand, maybe, and I don't pay taxes.
Shameless · 903 quotes
