Glowing, are they? Tell them not to be frightened, cos this is new energy saving paint we're using. It's designed to cut down on the electricity bills. Yeah. Yes. Yes, I understand. I'll be round to see you first thing in the morning. (puts the receiver down)
Well, I didn't know it was going to be luminous, did I?
Rodney
Do you realise our mum's grave is now going to become a beacon for every Satanist and acid-head in England? There's gonna be white witches dancing round that on a full moon! There's going to be chicken blood everywhere!
I wish you two could see yourselves; there's Mum and her monument, she's fast asleep, the third coat's hardly dry and you're already quivering in your shoes. Well, I'll tell you this much, I don't regret that I did it, and I will not bow my head to any snotty-nosed town hall clerks and their narrow-minded rules! I shall look 'em straight in the face and say "I am the man who's responsible and I'm proud of it!" [Del takes another look at the monument, grimaces and turns to face Rodney and Grandad] We'll put it down to vandals. Come on, let's get out of here before we get our collars felt!
Just deport him? You're joking! They've just had the World Cup here, haven't they?! They've got half of Manchester and Glasgow to get rid of first! By the time we get him back, he'll be eating paella and calling us gringoes!
(in the cell, recounting his earlier experience with the Spanish authorities) ...they took Nobby away and tortured him...all through the night, you could hear his screams!
What do you mean a waste of money? They're beautiful! Not only are they exquisite ornaments, guaranteed to brighten any sideboard, they are also a revolving musical box!
Rodney
They are China cats that play "How Much Is That Doggy In The Window."
Yeah, I saw her this morning, she'd just been down the police station.
Rodney
Right. There you are, you see; that's exactly the sort of thing... Hang on a minute, if this happened on Friday night, how come it's taken her 'til Wednesday to report it?
Oh, good day?! Good day?! Oh, the best Grandad! The very bloody best! I've been chased by a gendarme, attacked by Pussycat Willum, almost caught rabies and it's all this dipstick's fault!
I am 24 years old, I have two GSEs, thirteen years of schooling and three terms at an adult education centre behind me, right? And with all that, what have I become? I am a lookout.
Only Fools and Horses · 342 quotes
Rodney
