PPilot
Take us into the number two position, will you?
[getting up to leave] Speaking of the number two position...
The Green Slime
Invaders from the Deep
[Troy Tempest pilots the Stingray into a crater in the inkiest depths of the ocean bottom.]
CCrow
That's very well lit for the bottom of a crater of an abandoned volcano at the bottom of the sea.
TTCaptain Troy Tempest
No visible sign of trouble.
Not yet.
TTempest
Down SVC. Standby to surface.
LGLt. George "Phones" Sheridan
Standing by.
TTempest
Right. Blow 1.
PPhones
Blow 1.
JAJoel [as Tempest]
Pull my finger.
[as Marina, Tempest, and Phones dive through an underwater cave]
They stay down pretty good for being made out of wood.
[as Tempest and Phones are immobilized by a pink ray]
Are they sweating or is that sap?
...
CCrow
Forced to watch their own movie. How horrible.
[as Commander Sam Shore paces in a hover-chair]
Oh he's pacing, right?
CCrow
His boots weren't made for walking.
[as Stingray comes upon a deep extinct volcano]
CCrow
They're lucky to find an extinct volcano. I didn't even know they were endangered.
Phase IV
CCrow
Looks kinda skinny. Must be a Carpenter ant. [chuckling] Carpenter... get it? Carpenter ant. See 'cause--
[horrified] Oh no...
CCrow
Never mind.
You don't mean that...
Ant-orexic.
CCrow
[laughs] See? Servo got it.
You know, ants can carry entire watermelons. And big chicken legs. Happened in The Flintstones.
CCrow
I had a chicken leg once. I had to wear corrective shoes.
[During an unpleasant closeup of the queen ant laying eggs.]
CCrow
Hope no one's eating rice at this point.
So Crow, if we ever get off this ship, what's the first thing you're going to do when we get to Earth?
CCrow
Uh well the first thing I'm gonna do is kill Sandy Frank!
Oh, that's just a given!
[While the end credits roll.]
CCrow
I thought it was deep...
What did you think, Servo?
I thought it was pathetic.
CCrow
So deep, we should've been wearing boots.
This made flying turtles look good.
Cosmic Princess
[Tony and Koenig watch a video of an "alien" -- a man whose face shows through his pumpkin-shaped and -colored rubber mask.]
Kind of a jack-o'-lantern monster.
[deadpan] Ooh, very scary. I'm trembling.
CCrow
I think the prop department juuuust ran out of money.
[Integrating an alien power supply into their Eagle, Tony, reading some instructions, counts off numbers to Commander Koenig.]
TTony
1... 2...
SAServo [as Tony]
3...
TTony
5...
JCJoel, Crow, Servo
What?!
TTony
6...
That's why they're in such trouble.
TTony
7... 4.
CCrow
Well, they are British.
[During the credits.]
CCrow
Nick Brimble! I had a knick on my Brimble once.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mystery Science Theater 3000 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.