Lilo quotes from Lilo &amp; Stitch: The Series

So I hear there's an experiment out there that takes over inanimate objects?

Lilo

Yep, makes it look like other innocent experiments did bad stuff when they didn't do anything wrong at all.

Okay, I get it. My bad.

S1 E2 Phantasmo (Experiment 375)

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[after Phantasmo finds his one true place as possessing Macki Macaw to entertain]

I owe you both an apology. I was wrong about you. Innocent until proven guilty. I'm old enough to know that. I'm sorry.

Lilo

[whispers something into Stitch's ear] Okay, we'll forgive your behavior on one condition.

Nani buys games and pizza!

[chuckles] I guess that's fair.

S1 E2 Phantasmo (Experiment 375)

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[Lilo and Stitch are at a beauty salon]

Lilo

Now, pay attention, Stitch. To fit in on Earth, you need to be obsessed with how you look. [gesturing to two men who are mud-bathing] People come from all over to soak in this mud. They wanna be like pigs. Go ahead.

[Stitch grabs a handful of mud and shoves into his mouth, and then spits out on Lilo; Lilo then tries to throw the mud at Stitch, causing a large mud fight that messes up the entire beauty salon]

SOSalon Owner

[comes through the door] Stop right there! Oh, just look at this mess!

Lilo

Yeah, you really need to sweep all that hair.

SOSalon Owner

Not the hair! THE MUD!!

[Lilo hangs her head sadly; Stitch, however, looks at the owner angrily]

Agata! [throws mud at the owner]

[Lilo and Stitch then run out of the salon]

SOSalon Owner

And stay out!

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[Lilo and Stitch bring Clip home]

[screams] Keep that thing away from me!

Lilo

Cute little Clip?

Is not cute! Is Experiment #177, and is very dangerous.

Lilo

She doesn't look dangerous.

Ah, but looks can be deceiving. You see it was many years ago, when my head was overflowing with evil ideas...

[a flashback shows a younger Jumba with long black flowing hair]

[voice-over] ...and healthy luxuriant hair follicles. I had devised Experiment 177, the Uburnium Eater!

[flashback then shows a space-style gas station selling Uburnium]

Uburnium is the most powerful and economical fuel source in all of universe! My Ubernium Eater would spark an insurmountable fuel price!

[the flashback shows the price sign for Uburnium go higher until it explodes]

Unfortunately, in the language of Kweltiquan, word for "Uburnium" is same as word for "hair". I did not realize mistake until... too late! I had accidentally created Hair Eater!

[flashback then shows young Jumba activating 177 for the first time; Clip comes to life and immediately eats all of Jumba's hair; back to present]

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[Mertle Edmonds and the other hula girls exit the salon; Lilo hides the box Clip is in by sitting on it]

Hey, Weirdlo! I didn't know you got your hair cut here!

Lilo

I don't.

Of course you don't. They never even let you in the door with that mess.

Lilo

I like my hair!

You would! Maybe you should try this. [hands Lilo a bottle of hair conditioner] You'll need it more than I do.

Lilo

Wow! For me? "Hair Conditioner: For Taming Wild Unruly Hair?!" Hey!

Don't be jealous. Not everyone can have perfect hair like me, especially not you.

YTYuki, Teresa, and Elena

YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!

[the girls laugh as they leave]

Lilo

Mertle needs to be punished.

Yeah! Ih!

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[Lilo and Stitch sneak into Mertle's backyard dressed as cat burglars]

Lilo

[imitates radio static] Black Cat to Mutant Dog. Black Cat to Mutant Dog. Come in, Mutant Dog. Stitch! That's you!

Oh, me?

Lilo

When I say "Black Cat", you're supposed to answer "Mutant Dog". It's cat burglar code. Black Cat to...

Mutant Dog.

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[Lilo, Stitch, and Jumba are talking to Mrs. Edmonds after startling her]

Lilo

So you're not mad at us for scaring us like that?

Oh, no! Actually it was kinda exhilarating, in a frightening I-don't-know-what's-going-on sort of way.

Lilo

I'm sorry about what happened to your hair.

Don't be sorry. I love it. If you ever find that little furball you're looking for, I'm going to thank it.

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[after Mrs. Edmonds calls Jumba handsome, making him happy, his hair suddenly grows back]

Wow! That what I call a spontaneous something or other!

My hair! It has returned! I... HAVE... HAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

Lilo

Inside voice, Uncle Jumba.

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[Mertle and the girls walk by as Lilo and Stitch refuel their buggy]

Hey, there's Lilo! Should we invite her too?

Weirdlo? No way. Why would we want her to come?

Lilo

Hey, guys. Wanna see my new...

No.

Lilo

I didn't even say what it was yet.

The answer is still no.

Lilo

Okay. If you don't want to see the cutest thing ever.

If you think bugs are cute, I bet whatever it is, it's ugly!

Lilo

Yeah, well, you're wrong! He's even cuter than a potato...

Cuter than a potato?

[Mertle and the girls turn their attention to 254; they run up to his container to get a closer look]

Look at him! He is cuter than a potato!

Yuki

I want one!

Lilo

I knew you'd like him!

Ahem! [the girls huddle up with Mertle and they whisper something to each other, and then turn to Lilo] You are formally invited to the FHGH tea party tomorrow.

Lilo

Really? YAAAAY!! Um, what's that?

It's stands for "Future Hawaiian Girls of Hawaii". But you can only come if you bring him.

Lilo

Okay!

S1 E4 Mr. Stenchy (Experiment 254)

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[Lilo and Stitch take 254 to their house]

Yes, 254 is designed to be irresistible.

[254 gives a record to Stitch; Stitch angrily grabs the record and places 254 on it and makes it spin on Lilo's record player]

Of course, other experiments are immune to his charms.

[picks up 254] Well, I think he's absolutely precious, not at all like the little monster.

[Stitch growls with rage]

[takes 254] Uh, is best not being attached. It may look harmless, but in reality, is a ticking stink bomb.

Lilo

Stink bomb? This little guy?

Very soon, it will emit odor so noxious, will make 40 square mile area uninhabitable for decades! [laughs maniacally] But yes, is cute as garment fastener.

But he smells okay now.

254 is programmed to start his stinking 42 hours after activation to allow to time to infiltrate target. Problem is we have no way of knowing when he was activated.

[Stitch angrily has 254 tied up]

Is the smell really that bad?

[chuckles] Trust me. He'll have you losing many lunches with disgusting stench!

Lilo

[unties 254] Well, that's what I'm naming him: Mr. Stenchy! And I don't care how much he reeks. I'm keeping him.

[Stitch, shocked and angered by Lilo's words, screams into a pillow]

S1 E4 Mr. Stenchy (Experiment 254)

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[After Gantu explains to Lilo how Stitch locked Mr. Stenchy in the pantry...]

Lilo

[to Stitch] You mean... You did?

[remorseful] Uh-huh.

Lilo

But why? Were you jealous of Mr. Stenchy?

Ehh. (Translation: "Yes.")

Lilo

Okay, I'll forgive you for locking Mr. Stenchy in the pantry if you forgive me for letting him hog all the love. I mean, jealousy stinks, but we're still friends.

[after a moment] [accepting] Okay.

S1 E4 Mr. Stenchy (Experiment 254)

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Lilo

Stupid ball.

KOfficer Kahiko

It's only Lilo and her dog.

LLeilani

[annoyed] Ugh! Lilo again?! You should do something about that kalohe.

KOfficer Kahiko

Like, put her in the big house?

LLeilani

Would do her some good. That dog, too!

Excuse me! Hi. I'm looking for something for my daughter. It's her birthday tomorrow.

LLeilani

How 'bout this? [holds out a gold bracelet] I just made it yesterday, one of my best. [unaware with Experiment 606's pod on it as a charm]

Oh, it's perfect!

KOfficer Kahiko

How's it, Lilo?

Lilo

Oh, Officer Kahiko. I know the drill: I have the right to remain silent. Whatever I say...

KOfficer Kahiko

Very funny. [notices Lilo's football made of seaweed] What you got there?

Lilo

Football. We're on a budget.

KOfficer Kahiko

Lilo, I know you were just playing, but your dog wrecked Leilani's jewelry table. Auntie's on a fixed income. She don't need you causing trouble. Does your sister know you're here?

Lilo

Uh, no. But I'll tell her when I get home, okay?

KOfficer Kahiko

No worries. I got her on speed dial. [pulls out his phone]

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Everybody, I have an announcement to make. [clears throat] Ahem. Tomorrow is the most important day of the year: my birthday! I'm having a super special birthday party! [gives out birthday invitations only to Yuki, Teresa, and Elena] Oh, look. No more invitations.

Lilo

Well, that's okay. I wouldn't wanna come to your party anyway. Not with... that thing out there!

What thing?

Lilo

You mean to tell me that you've never heard of the... um... [notices a gecko] Geckoliki?

No!

Teresa

Uh-uh!

Yuki

What is it?

Lilo

It's an ugly horrible creature, whose soul purpose is to devour birthday cake and partygoers with its bloody fangs!

That's the stupidest thing I ever heard! And just for that, you're even more not invited now! Come on, girls! [she and the other girls leave]

Lilo

Alright, but you'll be sorry! The Geckoliki is hungry for blood! AND FROSTING!!

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Lilo

As soon as I put on this costume, it's hello, Geckoliki, and goodbye party. Now hold still, ok? [Stitch gets under her as they dress up as the Geckoliki; spookily] Ooh! I am the Geckoliki! Surrender now or face my slimy wrath!

Teresa

The Geckoliki!

[Mertle and her friends scream in terror and run for it]

[peeks through the fence hole and spots a plate of coconut cupcakes on the table] Ooh! Coconut cupcake! [bursts through the fence]

Lilo

Stitch, no! [falls off of Stitch and lands in the pool]

[The girls watch from the bushes, seeing Stitch scarfing down the cupcakes, still in the Geckoliki costume]

Teresa

The Geckoliki is after our blood! And frosting!

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[After Nani bring Lilo and Stitch both back home from "crashing" Mertle's birthday party]

Lilo

I'm telling you, there's an experiment pod on Mertle Edmonds' new bracelet that she got for her birthday.

Did you see number?

Lilo

That's what I was trying to do when Mrs. Edmonds dragged me off Mertle.

[Pleakley can be heard chanting before Nani and Jumba see him with his body twisted]

Oh, hello, fellow spirit beings. I hope my chanting wasn't bothering you.

Pleakley, are you alright?

Hmm? Oh, I'm incredible. Really, truly. It's so amazing. Yes, at first I was in excruciating pain, but it was all part of the process. Once I transcended that, I realized that the pain was just an illusion.

You have got to be kidding me! [grabs Pleakley and stretches his legs] Pain is only illusion! Ha!