Poison Ivy quotes from Harley Quinn

Poison Ivy

First of all, I care about the environment. Okay, I don't know what about that makes me a bad guy.

Harley Quinn

Yeah, says the girl who dissolved the head of Ace Chemicals in a bath of his own herbicide.

Poison Ivy

Best Earth Day ever.

Poison Ivy

Hey, buddy, now that you're done kissing your own asshole...

Lex Luthor

That's not a phrase.

Harley Quinn

So you got a fish tank and you do improv?

Poison Ivy

Wow, you're my shitty college boyfriend.

Poison Ivy

Is that what it stands for? I thought it was Legion of Dildos.

Lex Luthor

That is a sex shop down the street with whom we're currently in a protracted legal battle.

Poison Ivy

You're in a pot, Frank. I'd have to carry you.

Frank the Plant

So what? I carry you emotionally.

Harley Quinn

I know you were just trying to protect me and, listen, I'm gonna do the same thing for you. Okay, just cause I'm a card carrying member of the Legion of Doom now...

Poison Ivy

Fuck that place in the ass!

Scarecrow

Tsk tsk tsk. Trying to escape on surgery day. Don't worry, insurance will cover it. [beat] ...Obviously that was a joke; insurance would never cover this. I-I think we can all agree they're the real villains, yeah?

Poison Ivy

I would agree with tha— [Gets sedated]

Poison Ivy

Who the fuck braided my hair?

Eh, I was bored.

She has no powers now, she's just a helpless woman!

Poison Ivy

Uh, who still has hands! [Picks up a gun and shoots him] And the goddamn Second Amendment!

Harley Quinn

Yuck, you worry too much, Ive.

Poison Ivy

Uhhh, you know I think I am just worrying about the perfect amount, to be honest.

Harley Quinn

What? It's an ice flue. You know I can't resist alcohol being poured down an icy surface.

Poison Ivy

No, I did not know that.

Kite Man

Hey, does uh this tie go with kite?

Poison Ivy

No tie goes with the kite.

Poison Ivy

YOU came up with 'Two-Face'?

Harley Quinn

And I didn't get a single royalty...

Poison Ivy

I guess the acid really did change him.

Doctor Psycho

Which is why I just smoke joints. [Laughs alone] Fuck you, that was good one.

Bane

You cannot run from your problems, Harley. Hate weighs you down. Only love sets us free.

Harley Quinn

[Realising what she has to do] Ivy.

Poison Ivy

[Immediately getting it] No.

Harley Quinn

It's okay.

Poison Ivy

Don't, don't do this.

Harley Quinn

Have a good life, get married, make babies. Name them Harley. The girls and boys.

Poison Ivy

Harls!

Harley Quinn

See? It totally works. You know I love you. Bye, Ive.