Santana Lopez quotes from Glee

Santana

Not only am I giving you full visitation rights to the set of rambunctious twins that live on my rib cage, you get the chance to show that pastry bag Finn that he can't mess with Sam Evans. And not just because you can unlock your humongous jaw and swallow him whole like a python.

Santana

I wants on them froggy lips, and I want on them NOW.

Santana

My carousel horse sweater should make me look like an institutionalized toddler, but no. I look hot and smart. I feel like Michelle Obama.

Santana

Why don't you down a 4 Loco, Count Boozy Von Drunk a Ton?

Santana

Mr. Schue, I wrote another verse of Trouty Mouth. (Sam holding up the sign: hell no)

Santana

Wait, do you honestly think that we can sell twenty thousand pieces of anythings? I mean we won Regionals for the first time since dinosaurs ruling the planet and I still got a freakin' cherry icy facial.

Santana

I'm a closet lesbian and a judgmental bitch, which means one thing. I have awesome gay-dar.

Santana

I gotta gay--go. Go-- I gotta go.

Santana

Look, I'm not ready to start eating jicama or get a flat top yet, either. Maybe in junior college

Santana

The only straight I am is a straight up bitch.

Santana

Legend has it, right after I was born, I told the nurse she was fat.

Santana

Teen gay, you may now proceed to the next checkpoint without fear of violence.

Santana

They must have sensed I was a lesbian. They must have. Do I smell like a golf course?

Santana

[angrily yelling at Rachel and being held back] Escucha! Soy de Lima Heights Adjacents y yo tengo orgullo!. Sabes lo que pasa en Lima Heights Adjacents? Cosas Malas! (English translation: I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent and I'm proud! Do you know what goes down in Lima Heights Adjacent? Bad things!)

Santana

When did you get so smart?