Rory Gilmore quotes from Gilmore Girls

Lorelai

We very respectfully hover in his vicinity until the walk is over.

Sookie

Then we will politely ask him to get in touch with us.

Lorelai

Yes. Coming?

Rory

No, you guys go ahead. I'll be in the back of the line so that when the earth opens up and swallows you whole, I'll be here to tell the story.

Rory

Hey, here's a picture of Kirk pinned by the casket.

Lorelai

Oh, yeah, that's a good one.

Rory

Man, it's bad enough this had to happen, but his pants splitting on top of it?

Lorelai

Yeah. I hope he never takes too close a look at his life.

Rory

Amen. So this goes on the fridge, right?

Lorelai

"Where's the ladies room?" "More coffee, please." "Does Antonio Banderas live near here?"

Rory

We do not need to know how to say "Does Antonio Banderas live near here?"

Lorelai

Oh, yes, we do.

Rory

Mom.

Lorelai

When we're in Spain, we need to know how to say, "Does Antonio Banderas live near here?" When in France, "Does Johnny Depp live near here?"

Rory

When in Rome, "Does Gore Vidal live near here?"

Lorelai

You know, you look like me, yet my ways are completely lost on you.

Rory

Hm? Oh, I found that if I focus too much on one subject, I start to get a little punchy. This way, when I hit Bolshevik Revolution overload, I just shift over here and, oh, hello, Anne Boleyn is going down, and then when that gets too depressing, it's right over to calculus.

Lorelai

Saving the party subject for last, huh?

Lorelai

Now no one's around, but the second I run that light, a police car, four helicopters, the Canadian mounties and the crew of Cops jump out of a dumpster and I'm toast.

Rory

Paranoid.

Lorelai

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you, my friend.

Paris

Relax, I'm okay with you making valedictorian over me.

Rory

Oh, good, thanks.

Paris

Sure. I actually googled the personal histories of Ivy League valedictorians going back twenty-five years, and found some enlightening statistics. They don't necessarily do too well in later life, did you know that?

Rory

No.

Paris

Oh, yeah. A lot of business failures, crumbled marriages, suicides, obesity.

Rory

Okay.

Paris

A bunch died in car crashes, several did time, one suffocated when his cat fell asleep on his face.

Lorelai

[about Chilton] Wait, wait. Look around for a second. Notice?

Rory

Notice what?

Lorelai

It's not so scary anymore.

Rory

No, it's not.

Rory

What are we doing?

Lorelai

Leaving our mark. Got a knife?

Rory

A knife? For what?

Lorelai

For carving our initials. Come on. Knife, knife.

Rory

Sorry, I didn't put my switchblade in my sock.

Rory

Headmaster Charleston, faculty members, fellow students, family and friends, welcome. We never thought this day would come. We prayed for its quick delivery, crossed days off our calendars, counted hours, minutes and seconds and now that it's here, I'm sorry it is, because it means leaving friends who inspire me and teachers who've been my mentors, so many people who've shaped my life, and my fellow students lives impermeably and forever. I live in two worlds. One is a world of books. I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatawpha County, hunted the white whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina and strolled down Swann's Way. It's a rewarding world, but my second one is by far superior. My second one is populated with characters slightly less eccentric, but supremely real, made of flesh and bone, full of love, who are my ultimate inspiration for everything. Richard and Emily Gilmore are kind, decent, unfailingly generous people. They are my twin pillars, without whom I could not stand. I am proud to be their grandchild. But my ultimate inspiration comes from my best friend, the dazzling woman from whom I received my name and my life's blood, Lorelai Gilmore...

Sookie

[With tears in her eyes] Uh, oh -

Lorelai

[Also on the verge of crying] Hang in there.

Rory

My mother never gave me any idea that I couldn't do whatever I wanted to do or be whomever I wanted to be. She filled our house with love and fun and books and music unflagging in her efforts to give me role models from Jane Austen to Eudora Welty to Patti Smith. As she guided me through these incredible eighteen years, I don't know if she ever realized that the person I most wanted to be was her...

Sookie

[Choked up] Not crying.

Lorelai

[Slightly crying] Crying a little.

Sookie

Crying a little, but not blubbering. That's what we meant when we said no crying. No blubbering.

Rory

[Tearfully] Thank you Mom, you are my guidepost for everything.

Sookie

On the verge of blubbering here.

[Choked up, tearfully] Not doing too well myself.

Lorelai

[Looks over to see Luke] Not you, too.

Luke

[Tearfully blubbering] I'm blubbering, you freaks!

Lorelai

Hey Rory, I don't want you to freeze out your dad because I am.

Rory

I'm not.

Lorelai

Because I'm fine if you want to go back to the way things were.

Rory

I think that would be a little hard this time.

Lorelai

OK ,maybe not now, but eventually.

Rory

Eventually maybe, but for now, Solidarity, sister.

Lorelai

Ya-Ya!

Rory

You've been waiting 6 weeks to do that, haven't you?

Lorelai

Ya-Ya!

Paris

What if I fall for him but he doesn't like me?

Rory

You'll find someone else.

Paris

What if there is no one else?

Rory

Then you'll buy some cats.

Lorelai

'[describing her dream] I'm lying in bed and I'm sleeping and I'm wearing this fabulous nightgown, and like thirty alarm clocks go off, and so I get out of bed and I walk downstairs, and there, standing in the kitchen, is Luke!

Rory

Was he naked?

Lorelai

No! He was making breakfast.

Rory

Naked?

Lorelai

Okay, you've been in Washington way too long.

Rory

Oh, God!

Lorelai

What is it?

Rory

It's THAT.

Lorelai

Jess?

Rory

Yes.

Lorelai

You're upset about Jess?

Rory

I said "yes"!

Lorelai

Yes, it's Jess?

Rory

You're not being funny!

Paris

I can’t do this.

Rory

What?

Paris

Date. I can’t date. I’m not genetically set up for it.

Rory

Not true.

Paris

I get no pleasure out of the prospect or the preparation. I’m covered in hives, I’ve showered four times, and for what? Some guy who doesn’t even have the brains to buy a Zagat so we don’t wind up in a restaurant that’s really just a front for a cocaine laundering ring?

Lorelai

All right, you got home too late last night and I didn’t get a chance to talk to you.

Rory

I got home at ten and you were already asleep.

Lorelai

Well, I was trying to watch The Legend of Bagger Vance again.

Rory

Okay, what did I miss?

Lorelai

Okay. Kirk asked me out.

Rory

Shut up!

Lorelai

Yesterday he came to the inn and asked me to dinner.

Rory

That’s so sweet.

Lorelai

Sweet?

Rory

You should wear your dress with the ponies on it. I bet he likes ponies.

Lorelai

Rory, I cannot go out with Kirk.

Rory

Why?

Lorelai

Uh huh. . .why? He's. . .he's Kirk!

Rory

Well, as long as he loves you.

Lorelai

You are not serious.

Rory

I just want you to be happy.

Lorelai

: Hello Headmaster Charleston, this is my stepfather Kirk. Please don't make any sudden movements, he's a fear biter.