[After finding out that Master Fnog is the trainer of Destructor]
Come on, Bender, let's hit the gym. I'm gonna teach you how to fight like a girl.
[vengefully] I'll put on my tutu...
S2Raging Bender
FFnog
You were an excellent student. Too bad I was a lousy teacher!
I'm going to a movie...with friends!
BBBillionaire Bot
You'll be the most unpopular robot fighter since Sergeant Feces-Processor.
Let's commence preparations for rumbling!
Man, I thought Ultimate Robot Fighting was real, like pro-wrestling, but it turns out it's fixed, like boxing.
Bender, you can't be an Ultimate Robot Fighter. It's the most brutal form of competition in the galaxy!
It is?
There are no rules. Two robots enter, one robot leaves. Then later the other robot leaves after being declared the winner.
Well, that doesn't sound so bad.
Oh, did I mention the crippling, agonising pain? I'm pretty sure I did. Oh, yes, definitely.
AAnnouncer
You loved him as Bender the Offender! Now get ready to hate him as he threatens your sexuality in his new persona ... The Gender Bender!
[The picture is replaced with Bender in the tutu wearing a wig. He is lying on a bed kicking his legs back and forth and holding a pink phone.]
[girly voice] I'm a real toughie!
AAnnouncer
Squaring off this Sunday versus Destructor!
[The picture is replaced with Destructor talking into a red phone]
DDestructor
I will destroy you! [He hangs up then picks up again.] And stop calling me!
[Getting beaten up by Destructor] Thrown in the towel Fry. [Fry stands there] For God sake, Fry!
[Turns to reveal a brain-slug on his head] Errrrrr...
[With a brain-slug attached] That's exactly what I was thinking.
S2A Bicyclops Built For Two
Good news, everyone. Several years ago I tried to log on to AOL, and it just went through.
Go ahead, get into these net suits. I designed and tested them myself.
[She sniffs her glove.] They smell like burning Rhesus Monkey.
Really? I guess when you're around it all day you stop noticing. Off you go.
[The gang is logged onto the internet in virtual reality]
Behold... the Internet!
My God! It's full of ads!
[on the internet, Amy finds a door titled "Amy Wong Naked". She looks inside]
Hey! That's me!
No it isn't. I just took some pictures of your face and stuck them on someone else's body.
[Leela looks inside]
Hey!
[Bender is disguised as a sexy nurse, talking to a chat room participant.]
Hi, I'm a naughty nurse, and I really need someone to talk to. $9.95 a minute.
CRChat room participant
Oh, you're a dollar naughtier than most.
[He hands Bender the money.]
So, how 'bout them Knicks?
Well, thanks to the Internet, I'm now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence?
[sarcastically] Is the Space Pope reptilian?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.