Good news, everyone. Several years ago I tried to log on to AOL, and it just went through.
“A Bicyclops Built For Two” · Season 2
In this episode: Turanga Leela (7), Bender (6), Alcazar (5), Philip J. Fry (4), Professor Hubert Farnsworth (2), Amy Wong (1)
Go ahead, get into these net suits. I designed and tested them myself.
[She sniffs her glove.] They smell like burning Rhesus Monkey.
Really? I guess when you're around it all day you stop noticing. Off you go.
[The gang is logged onto the internet in virtual reality]
Behold... the Internet!
My God! It's full of ads!
[on the internet, Amy finds a door titled "Amy Wong Naked". She looks inside]
Hey! That's me!
No it isn't. I just took some pictures of your face and stuck them on someone else's body.
[Leela looks inside]
Hey!
[Bender is disguised as a sexy nurse, talking to a chat room participant.]
Hi, I'm a naughty nurse, and I really need someone to talk to. $9.95 a minute.
CRChat room participant
Oh, you're a dollar naughtier than most.
[He hands Bender the money.]
So, how 'bout them Knicks?
Well, thanks to the Internet, I'm now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence?
[sarcastically] Is the Space Pope reptilian?
After all this time, somebody else with one eye... who ISN'T a clumsy carpenter or a kid with a BB gun.
This sacred mosaic depicts our goddess of beauty.
Hmm. You got any sacred artwork of her from the back?
By the way, your pal Fry fell in the dungeon. Take him a taco so he doesn't die and stink up the place.
Come on, Al. Can't you let the little guy out?
Geez, Leela! Twice in one day? I'm not Superman!
ASAlcazar's friends
WOOOOO!
Leela, you have to get me out of here. It's horrible! Eating scraps, letting my waste drop where I stand like an animal in the zoo.
Animals go on the corner.
The corner! Why didn't I think of that?
[singing] I like stealing, I like taking things.
Hey, where'd you get this couch and that TV set and all this stuff?
They were giving it away on the street corner. Just like you, Leela!
ASAlcazar's friends
WOOOOO!
Too bad they weren't giving away the three things you actually need: Mouthwash, a back wax and stain-proof underwear.
ASAlcazar's friends
WOOOOO!
Well, this is the real me. But I can explain: We all have needs. Mine was to make it with five weirdos and have them scrub my five castles. I gave you all what you wanted and of course I made a few bucks letting Pig watch through the two-way mirror. Can any of you say you wouldn't have done the exact same thing in my position?
He's a saint!
Alright, Alcazar, I just have one last question for you.
What's that?
If you can change form, why didn't you change it in the one place that counts?
EEveryone
WOOOOO!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.