Becky, do you know something I don't?
Yes, I do. The gestation period of an elephant is 22 months.
Actually, I knew that.
S4Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
S4The Graduates
[As Danny and Kirsten get ready to go out on their date]
[imitates Walter Brennan] Ah, well, you kids run along now, and, by gosh, have fun. And, by golly, don't stay out too late.
KKirsten
Hey! Great Ronald Reagan.
That's Walter Brennan.
S4Rock the Cradle
[Rebecca is trying to break the news of her pregnancy to Jesse via "Win, Lose, or Draw" by drawing a picture of a baby in a blanket]
She's having... a hot dog!
No!
Well, what? It's clearly a bun with a weenie sticking out with a happy face.
No, Jess. It's not "She's having a hot dog", it's "She's having a baby", and the "she" is me! I'm having a baby!!
Michelle, what are you doing up?
I didn't get to say good night to Big Bird.
Big Bird?
That's our baby.
You named our baby "Big Bird"?
Yeah, just until we find out if it is a girl or a boy or a nine-foot yellow Muppet.
S5Double Trouble
Jess, we're having twins! Oh, honey!
Twins? I just wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl.
LMr. Lowry
Stephanie, would you like to introduce us to your guest?
Uh, not really.
I'm her sister, Michelle.
LMr. Lowry
Hi. I'm Mr. Lowry.
(to Stephanie) You were right. He is a major babe!
I'll babysit my new cousins anytime, except for Friday and Saturday nights.
And I'll take Friday and Saturday, until I start dating.
I'll help, too, but no diapers. They make me apprehensive.
S5Matchmaker Michelle
[when Michelle talks about how she doesn't have a mommy] You should get one. Mommies use fabric softener on your pajamas.
My daddy does that.
Mommies always have lots of candy in their purse.
My daddy keeps Wet Wipes in his wallet.
Mommies wear makeup and pretty dresses.
You got me there.
Daddy, guess what, guess what, guess what?
What, what, what?
Miss Wiltrout says a clean room is a happy room!
Sounds like my kind of teacher!
[sitting on her bed when there's a knock on the door] Come in.
Hi, Michelle.
Hi, Daddy.
[sits on the floor] I think we have to talk.
I think we'd better.
I'm sorry you went to so much trouble today.
I wish I had a mommy.
Well, I know you don't remember, but you had a wonderful mommy. And she loved you very, very much.
It's no fair. All the other kids have mommies.
Well, I know it might seem like everybody else has a mommy. But honey, the truth is some people just have a mommy or they just have a daddy or a grandma, or a grandpa, or an aunt and uncle. There's all different kinds of families.
Really?
Yeah. What makes a family is when you have people who take care of one another and love each other. You have a very special family: you have a daddy, and an Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky, and a Joey.
[smiles] I bet nobody in school has a Joey.
[laughs] That's a pretty safe bet. So you see, in a way, you and your sisters are pretty lucky. Because you have four people who care about you and love you very, very much.
I love you very, very much. [hugs him]
I love you too.
S5Take My Sister, Please
[walks down the stairs and sees bags of chips on the table] Wow! A million bags of chips and no one's in the room?
Jess, you're missing the point. It's not about where you go. It's about you guys being there for us. I mean, okay, so maybe we're a little over-emotional, and maybe we do get a little demanding, but that's because our hormones are running wild. I mean we're happy, we're sad, we're all hot, we're cold, we're huge! And all we want are ridgey potato chips and a nice slice of juicy watermelon with a side of Swiss chocolate. Now, is that too much to ask?! I DON'T THINK SO!!
S5Oh, Where, Oh, Where Has My Little Girl Gone?
What's happening to D.J. and me? We used to be so close. Becky, I feel like I'm losing my little girl.
You see? You don't even knock! You have no respect for my personal space.
Don't you dare tell me about respect! You're yelling and slamming doors? What happened to my sweet little girl?
Don't you get it?! I'm not your little girl anymore!
S5The King and I
This is my one shot at a record deal.
But you're my partner in the balloon race.
Well, get another partner.
But you promised.
Michelle, I can't.
But you promised.
Michelle, I have to write my song.
But you promised!
Well, then I'm gonna break my promise! I'm not going to the stupid picnic! So leave me alone! [walks out]
Jess...
Uncle Jesse yelled at me.
Oh, Michelle, I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it. Come on, we're still gonna have fun at the family picnic.
Uncle Jesse's not nice anymore.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Full House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.