Breakfast is ready. We're having pan... (sees Jesse's hair) ...cuts
S2 E1Cutting It Close
(upon seeing Jesse's new haircut) You went from Eddie Van Halen to Pee-Wee Van Herman.
S2 E4D.J.'s Very First Horse
(D.J. has brought her horse inside the house)
How did...? Where did you...? How'd - help me out here.
I can explain.
No, no, wait. Don't tell me. You're walking by the supermarket, and some kid had a litter of these in a cardboard box. (calls out) Joey!
Jess, I am trying to put the baby to-- Horse? How did you...? Where did you...? How did it--?
My words exactly.
Oh, this is great. Danny's going to walk in here, see this horse and blame me for the whole thing. Do you know why? Because this is *very* funny.
(laughs)
Danny's gonna flip his gourd. We gotta get this horse out of here.
Well, how do we get him out?
We'll feed him, give him food. What does he eat?
Hay.
We don't have any hay.
Jess, you went to the market, and you didn't pick up any hay?
Don't get me in trouble. Hide the tail!
I'll tell you what, if you can keep this secret for two weeks, I'll let you own part of the horse.
Which part do I get?
The tail.
My very own tail?
S2 E6Beach Boy Bingo
I am stoked! Whatever that means.
S2 E7Joey Gets Tough
You watch Wake Up, San Francisco because it's nice, and easy. Well this morning, I had a little too much coffee, so we're gonna do it nice... and rough.
S2 E11A Little Romance
NNick
(to Rebecca after she paid seventeen hundred dollars for Jesse in a date auction.) You know you could've had him for free.
S2 E12Fogged In
[Jesse enters his room where D.J. is recording her own version of "The Locomotion"]
What are you doing?
The Locomotion.
[Jesse looks closely at the tape]
Where'd you get this tape?
It was in there.
Oh, no. [rewinds the tape] Please, tell me you didn't tape over my Casa de Pancakes jingle.
[after he's finished rewinding, he plays the recording on the tape of "The Locomotion", then to the end of...]
JJJesse and Joey
[on recording] Casa de Pancakes. OLE!
[Jesse disappointedly stops the tape]
I can't believe it! It's gone! You guys destroyed it! Now I'm gonna hafta do the whole thing over again.
What happened?
Aw, they messed up my jingle tape. Joey's goin' away. I'm gonna hafta do this whole thing over again.
Don'tcha think you're overreacting?
Overreacting? You think I'm overreacting?! I'm not overreacting! Okay?! I had this all worked out! I spent the whole night doin' it! Now my whole life is ruined! Okay. Now, I'm overreacting.
Jess, ya lost your temper again. Huh?
Well, she shouldn't be in here-- [sighs] Ah, I'm just tired. I lost my cool. I did come down on her pretty hard. Didn't I? She'll be okay?
I think you better straighten this out.
Yeah. All right. I know just how to handle this.
Good. Jesse?
Huh?
D'you need a hug?
Haven't I been through enough?
S2 E15Pal Joey
Hey! One at a time!
SSheldon
There's the kid who was picking on me!
BMiss Borland
That's it, I'm calling your parents!
But...
Wait, Miss Borland. That boy's lying, Joseph has been a perfect angel.
SSheldon
Tanner's the liar!
BMiss Borland
That's not possible! Daniel Tanner's never been in trouble a day in his life. Let's you and I visit the principal, Sheldon.
YJYoung Joey & Young Danny
Sheldon?
SSheldon
(Looking at Young Joey & Young Danny)
Thanks man, you saved my life!
You saved me first.
S2 E16Baby Love
Dustin? You would name our child Dustin?
Yeah, you got a better name?
I sure do... Emily.
No son of ours is gonna be named Emily.
Our daughter's name is Emily. Our son's name is Prescott.
Prescott? Might as well name him Emily. Our son is gonna be called Dustin.
Prescott.
Dustin!
Prescott!
Dust... When did we have a kid?
Well, we better get going. You don't wanna miss your plane.
CConnie
You're right, it might accidentally take off on time. Come on, Howie, wake up. It's time to go.
Howie, no go.
Howie, yes go. Howie go back home.
Me go.
[imitates an Indian] No, little Kemo Sabe. No can go to Nebraska. Take many moons.
S2 E17El Problema Grande de D.J.
LLinda
Hasta luego.
Ah... El Pollo Loco!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Full House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.