CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Season 11 quotes

Hodges

So, is this, uh, bullet fragment telling you a story?

Greg

Once upon a time, a cranium met a nine-by-19 millimeter Parabellum round. The end.

Nick

I think I'm gonna grab a beer... or ten. You wanna join me?

Catherine

I don't think so.

Nick

[grins] You sure? We could talk about our feelings.

Sara

Everything that happens to us, the good and the bad, is part of us. Took me a long time to realize that, uh, it doesn't have to define who we are, we get to decide that.

Dr. Robbins

Mrs. Robbins has a birthday. The big one. She doesn't want to make much of it, which means I have to. You got any ideas?

Catherine

Can't go wrong with diamonds. Girl's BFF.

Dr. Robbins

Man's worst enemy.

Brass

Drop the Woodward and Bernstein act, okay?

Can I help you, officers?

Nick

You sure can, big man. I gotta take a look at your trucks.

Why?

Nick

[handing him the warrant] Because that piece of paper says so.

Catherine, you're a crime scene investigator, not Erin Brockovich.

Hodges

Wh-What is with this family? Even the animals hate each other.

Sara

Why didn't you just separate them, Hodges?

Hodges

Even though I project an aura of raw courage and unwavering self-confidence, I suffer from... ornithophobia.

Sara

You're afraid of birds.

Hodges

Let's just say that I was terrorized by a flock of Canadian geese while visiting my uncle in Saskatchewan.

Brass

So Sylvester and Tweety whacked their owners.

Greg

Think of it as a series of unfortunate events.

Brass

What do you mean, don't think of it as a cartoon?

Nick

Isn't this a little Cirque du Soleil?

Catherine

I-I-I've had all the complicated relationships I can handle. This is who I am. Please don't try to change me. I promise I won't try to change you.

Vartann

So, what? Take it or leave it?

Catherine

Call me when you decide.

David

Looks like a .22.

Dr. Robbins

Used to be the preferred caliber for mobsters and assassins.

David

[with a rap accent] Nowadays they go for a Glock four-oh.

Dr. Robbins

Thank you, Ten Cent. Why don't you move him to autopsy, and try not to bust any rhymes on the way out.

Greg

And I quote: "She is not merely dead, she is most sincerely dead."

Nick

I beg to differ, Dorothy.

Greg

If you knew your Wizard of Oz, you'd know that it was the Munckhin coroner that pronounced her dead, not the girl with the dog.

Brass

Nice little crime scene you got here. So you called in your own 4-19 off a web posting? I mean, I heard of firemen setting fires to get overtime. Don't tell me you're dropping bodies for extra cash.

Hodges

Group, I'd like you to meet Dr. Raymond Langston, Nick Stokes and Greg Sanders. These are our CSI field agents. They go out and collect all those little bits of evidence, and then they bring them to me for answers. [about the burned victim] Ooh! Looks like they're cooking up a searing mystery today.