What do you see?
Nothing.
What are you looking for?
A punchline?
Ba-dum-bum.
S3 E20Last Laugh
S3 E21Forever
I'm gonna find out what Rone's mothers maiden name is.
What's his mother got to do with it?
She may have sold me my engagement ring.
S3 E22Play with Fire
Nevada State Correctional Facility. Pretty casual for a prison.
It's medium-security...
...for nicer criminals.
[laughing] Right.
You got a minute?
I was just leaving.
Yeah, the schedule says you're off tonight.
I am.
Me too.
You should be on paid leave.
I'm fine.
You were fortunate and I'm not talking about the explosion.
You, uh, you talked to Brass.
And Nick.
We got the guy.
Is that all you have to say?
Would you like to have dinner with me?
No.
Why not? Let's... let's have dinner... let's see what happens.
Sara... I don't know what to do about this.
I do... you know by the time you figure it out, it really could be too late.
S3 E23Inside the Box
Albert. Got a minute?
Sure. What's up?
I'd like a second opinion.
[Next shot of them is after he checked Grissom's ear]
I wish you had come to me sooner. The condition is pretty far along. Why'd you wait?
[sighs] I hoped it would go away.
Doesn't your mother have this condition?
Yeah. It's hereditary. I know I wasn't rational.
Look, Gil. I'm not gonna preach to you, you came to me. But Doctor to Doctor there's a chance the bone deposits have spread into the inner ear. In which case your hearing loss will eventually be permanent. If I were you, I'd schedule surgery as soon as possible.
I'm not going with you.
What do you mean?
I'm scheduled for surgery at Desert Palm.
Surgery? [She walks over to him] Your hearing?
[nods] Yep.
I'm sorry.
I'm not. Has to be done.
What can I do?
Nothin', I'm fine. Take care of the case.
Wha--ah, that's it?
That's it. Um... good luck.
S4 E1Assume Nothing
[Nick sees Grissom examining the Magic Fingers]
Haven't you ever seen one of those before?
Not in person, no.
Magic Fingers. Twenty-five cents for 15 minutes of vibration. Died a slow death in the '70s due to vandalism and seedy connotations. Good for sex. Good for sleep ... too.
Good for us. Given the killer's appetite for sexual persuasion, maybe they blew the circuit. Overloaded it with coins.
And their prints on those coins.
[Grissom, after his ear surgery, hears the vibration of Catherine's cellphone against her bag]
Your phone's ringing.
You can hear that?...[Smiles] You're back.
What?
S4 E2All for Our Country
Linens and towels from The Sphere on top of the washing machine, and what I believe to be sheets from the motel inside the dryer. Both positive presumptive for blood.
Think they were being smart taking the sheets, or did they just get off sleeping on 'em?
Either way, they were sick and dangerous.
What does that say about whoever killed them?
Whoa, this isn't half bad for college kids.
Yeah, why live in a one room flea bag when you can pool your resources and live like this.
Hey how about it, you, me, Warrick, Nick, Grissom?
Oh, nah, not Grissom.
[Catherine and Sara walk into the house. Water is pouring down, almost like it's raining, from the second story and the two police officers on scene are using umbrellas]
What the hell is this?
OOfficer
Ma'am, you may want to take one of these. [The officer hands Sara an umbrella]
Thank you, thanks!
Where's the body?
OOfficer
Upstairs.
Upstairs?
OOfficer
Yeah.
[long pause]
It's raining MAN JUICE?
Hallelujah?
[One of the officers dashes over to give them two pairs of boots]
OOfficer
You might want to wear these.
Thank you.
FFromansky
Someday, you're going to need me or my buddies at a scene... and wouldn't you know it, we all hit traffic on the way.
Is that how you do your job, officer?
FFromansky
Have a safe night.
So I ran the blood you found on the gun through CODIS... on my own time... of which I have precious little...
Greg, why do you always trail off like that?
Because you make me nervous.
So who's the punk now... bitch?
S4 E3Homebodies
Sun Tzu once said "“If you wait by the river long enough, the bodies of your enemies will float by." [opens the door to find a mummified body] But those were brutal times.
S4 E4Feeling the Heat
You know, if I had my choice about how I was going to go out, it would not be electrocution. I think an aneurysm in my sleep, quick and painless.
I like surprises.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's CSI: Crime Scene Investigation pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.