Dennis Kaufman is a brilliant puppeteer. He does a wonderful Punch & Judy.
He better have a wonderful punch, if he's going to dress like Judy.
S4 E22Diane Chambers Day
S4 E23Relief Bartender
[Business isn't doing well at Cheers now that Sam is the host]
I'll think of something.
Skimpy outfits on the waitresses, Sammy.
That's not bad.
Wait a minute. I don't want people having a look at something I'm ashamed of.
You've got a lovely body.
[pointing at Diane] I was talking about hers.
I'll think of something.
Well I don't know what.
You don't have my brain.
Whoever has it should return it. You need it right now.
The Fraternal Order of the Caribou are sending a group over.
Great. Loud-mouthed, rowdy conventioneers. drinking like fish, swearing like sailors and putting their paws all over us.
Yeah, happy birthday to me.
S4 E24Strange Bedfellows: Part 1
[to Janet Eldridge] I will deliver you the postal vote.
Yeah, too bad it will be to the wrong address.
[about Sam] I think he might be hurt by this liaison with Janet Eldridge.
Yeah you're right. He's havin' a lot of laughs and a hot time with a beautiful woman. The man is a glutton for punishment.
S4 E25Strange Bedfellows: Part 2
Hey, Mr. Peterson, can I pour you a beer?
Okay Woody but be sure to stop me at 1. Ah, make that 1:30.
JJanet
Since things are over between you and Diane, I wonder why she still continues to work here.
She's gotta work someplace.
JJanet
She owe you money that's she trying to work off?
No.
JJanet
Would you lose customers if she leave?
No. As a matter of fact, I'd probably get a few back if I did let her go.
S4 E26Strange Bedfellows: Part 3
Looks like Sammy got his walking papers. I know how he feels.
Yeah I think we've all been there before, Woody.
Well it's never happened to me, so I guess I'll just have to imagine it.
Cliffie, you actually have to go with someone before you can get dumped.
How you feeling today, Mr. Peterson?
Pour.
I'm so sorry to hear that.
[pointing to the beer tap] No, I meant pour.
S5 E1The Proposal
Sam?
Did you notice that?
Notice what?
Everything just got calm.
I don't notice any difference.
Oh, yes, yes. There's a difference in everything. The whole world just changed for me. [pause, looking up] Ohh, look. The stars are new. The moon is new. Sam Malone is new, and I like him. [pointing to the stars] And I like them. And they like me. And none of us like you.
[Sam takes a step towards Diane.]
Am I going overboard again?
No, no, no. Don't be silly. That would mean I care, and I don't. Bye bye, Diane.
Where are you going?
I'm going to swim ashore.
You can't do that.
Very well, I'll take the dingy. See how quickly the new Sam adjusts.
You're going to just leave me out here all alone?
Yes, I am.
[sighs] Sam. Sam Malone, if you leave me out here all alone, you are the most despicable creature on Earth!
Well, I... y'am what I y'am, and that's all that I y'am.
Are you in pain, Woody?
No, I was just thinkin'.
Yeah, the first time's always the worst.
Who do you think Sam's gonna propose to, tonight?
What're you babblin' about, Billy Bob Joe Jim?
S5 E2The Cape Cad
The one thing I really hate is to eat alone. I always feel like someone's looking at me.
I'm the only one here.
Well you're looking at me.
You can either join me or I can eat with my eyes closed.
I see what you're doing here. You're trying to plant a seed in my brain.
Oh don't be silly. I know of nothing that grows in solid rock.
S5 E3Money Dearest
My first bachelor party. No dates, right?
Hey, Fitzie, thanks for that $20 tip last night. I don't want you getting the wrong idea about me.
FMr. Fitzgerald
Carla, I know that your favors are not for sale.
See, that's what I mean about the wrong idea.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Cheers pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.