BMO quotes from Adventure Time

Oh, oh BMO, how'd you get so pregnant?

Why are you not talking?! What happened to Finn and Jake?! YOU HAVE TAKEN OVER THEIR BODIES!

Air? Are you there, Air? It's me, BMO. [walks to a snow-covered rock and sits down] I know it's been a long time since we talked. Sorry about that. But, well... maybe if you don't want to talk, you could just listen. Moe told me if I do this thing, I'll be all grown up. And that sounds cool, I guess. Like... [see a much taller BMO in his car] If I was grown, then I could drive to the playground all by myself. And... I could buy my own pacifiers at the store if I was grown. [tall BMO struggles to open the door] But then... if I change, will Finn and Jake still love me? [see smeared versions of Finn and Jake] Will I still love them? Moe changed into a new body... and he's still the same, I guess, sorta. But does growing up just change your body? Or... also your soul? [sighs] Maybe I could just stay the same forever.

Whooo wants to play video gaa~mes?

BEEMO!!

Jake

What's on the menu, Beemo?

I've created a new game called "Conversation Parade."

Ha, alright! / Start it up, Beemo!

[singing] What do you think about the stars in the sky

Finn

S'okay, I guess.

Jake

Yeah, they're cool.

That is an interesting response. Battery low! SHUTDOWN.

Finn

Argh!! Every time!! BMO, this game is the worst! If we were really inside that game, man, we would crush Sleepy Sam, breezily — with my mitts.

Oh, no! It's much more dangerous than you think.

Finn

Whoa, whoa, wait!

Jake

Beemo, is there a way for us to get in the game for real?

Yes, of course, Jake. [opens compartment with a red button] If I push this button—

If I push this button, you will both be dangerously transported into my main-brain-game-frame, where it is very dangerous.

Finn

Oh, man! Oh, BMO! You gotta let us in that game!

No! It's a far-too-dangerous incredible adventure for you. That's final.

Finn

[beat] Oh... okay, BMO. Welp, time for bed!

Jake

Finn?

Finn

Time for bed. [elbows him] Right, Jake?

Jake

Oh, right! Heh-heh. G'night, BMO. [BMO looks at them suspiciously] Time for bed.

Finn

Get the camera, Jake!

Jake

I can't! I'm paralyzed by the cuteness!

Beemo! Beemo! Beemo! Beemo!

[pushes Finn and Jake aside] What? What? What? What?

Beemo, get the camera!

BMO is camera.

Ice King

"Hello, dear diary. Pretty good day so far. Got up bright and early, had a healthy and slimming breakfast, did fourteen minutes of cardio, and then I finally got around to..." [continues]

Jake

Dude... what are we watchin'?

Finn

I think it's the Ice King's diary.

Ice King

"I mean, I'm not gonna win carpenter of the year or anything, but it's a place to hang up the old toothbrush." [a Gunther jumps on bed]

Gunther

"Wenk." [walks to the camera]

Ice King

"Gunther. Hey, Gunther. Get-get away from the camera, sweetie. Papa's recording his innermost thoughts. 'Member, I explained this to you? [Gunther rubs his belly] Hey, Gunther? [Gunther jumps up and down] GUNTHER!!"

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"Well, anyway, as you can see, I'm not wearing my—"

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"I'm not wearing my—"

Gunther

"Wenk, wenk."

Ice King

"Sweetie, I raised my voice because you were giving me the silent treatment. You understand?"

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"I love you."

Jake

Can we fast-forward?

Finn

N-No, man. We might miss something.

Ice King

[sighs] "There must be more to life than this."

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"I know, you don't like when I'm contemplative. C-Contemplative? No. Con-tem-plat— C— Let's put on a play!"

Jake

What?! [cut footage to Ice King in PB makeup and Gunther with crown and beard]

Ice King

"Oh, Ice King, you're so cool! You take such good care of yourself! I wanna be with you! [Gunter then pulls off beard] No, Gunther, beard stays on."

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"Gunther, I need you to wear the beard!"

Gunther

"Wenk."

Ice King

"Gunther!"

Jake

Hey, pause it, Beemo.

Finn

There's gotta be some evil secrets in here. I wanna keep watching.

Jake

Okay.. Well, why don't I make us some snacks? [sluggish] So I don't have to watch this...

Can we sit on the floor? I feel so far away from you guys.

Finn

[offscreen] Jake! Hey, Jake! [Jake takes off one side of his headphones] Jake!

Jake

What?

Finn

Come here! Ya gotta check this out!

Jake

Yeah, okay.

Finn

Check this out, man. This bear is tops blooby! [Jake rolls his eyes and sighs] Watch this. [Finn inhales and the bear does the same] Choo! [the bear does the same] Ya gotta try this, Jake. He does everything I do!

[laughing] Oh, stop! [Finn pulls BMO away]

Finn

Haha, come on, Jake, try it!

It's awesome!

Jake

Heh-heh. Um... Yeah, okay. [grabs a broom and starts sweeping] Sweepy-sweepy-sweepy. Sweep sweep sweep. [sweeps the bear's side] Sweepin'!

Finn

He's got me down pat! Heh-hah! Sweeping's weak.

Jake

[annoyed] Mmmmmm...

[spoke] Sweeping weak.

Jake

[beat] This guy just busted me up my chops, Finn!

Finn

Hey, come on, he's just a bear. He don't know nothin'.

Jake

Mmmm... Yeah, I guess. Well, anyway, it's gettin' pretty late. Probably time for everyone to go back home to their own houses.

Finn

Yeah, I guess you're right, Jake. It is pretty late. He should probably stay here tonight. [Jake scowls] You can sleep in the bathtub.

Brathtrub!

Finn

[laughing] Brathtub! This guy is tops blooby!

Jake

Okay, now it's the battle phase. I'm attacking your schoolhouse with my Husker Knights. [summons three corn-shaped knights] And, I'm casting Cerebral Bloodstorm! [summons a flying brain which rains down a cornfield] So, what do you use to defend? [his Husker Knights and Cerebral Bloodstorm starts charging into Finn's side]

Finn

Uhh... can my Cool Dog and Ancient Scholar defeat your Husker Knights? [Jake laughs out loud]

Jake

Of course not!

Finn

Hmm... Then, I floop the pig.

Jake

What?! [he giggles]

Finn

What?

Jake

Okay, okay. First of all, you don't floop a creature to make it fight. You activate a creature.

Finn

Hmm, no — it says I can floop the pig. See? [summons a pig]

Jake

No! He's eating all my cornfields! My Husker Knights draw energy from corn! [his Knights drop dead]

Finn

And since I'm not actually attacking, your Cerebral Bloodstorm only does damage to your own kingdom's troops. [the Bloodstorm strikes thunder to his Knights; Jake gasps loudly]

Jake

You just wiped out my entire attack!

Finn

What do you expect if all your power units come from corn? Pigs eat corn, dude. Cornfields stink.

Jake

Cornfields are awesome!! What makes you think you know so much about Card Wards?!

Finn

It's just logic.

Jake

You're the cool guy, huh? Well, let me make it a little hot for you, then. (He chuckles sinisterly as he floops a land card) I floop the VOLCANO!

Finn

WHA!? That'll destroy your kingdom, too, won't it?!

Jake

(scoffs) Maybe.

Finn

AAH! MY PIG!!!

Jake

(chuckles) The pig is dead.

Jake

YOU GANKED MY SPIRIT WALKER!!!

Finn

Uh...maybe we should take a break?

Jake

Your turn.

Finn

Huh?!

Jake

(grows large) YOU PLAY! YOU PLAY!!!

Finn

Oh, zang!

Finn

I gotta use the boy-style room!

Finn

(whispering) BMO. BMO.

BMO CHOP! If this were a real attack, you'd be dead.

Oh, no! Are you winning the game of Card Wars?

Finn

Yeah.

That's terrible! If Jake loses that game, he gets super depressed. When I beat him, he wouldn't talk to me for a month!

Finn

Wha? I only played so he wouldn't be bummed.

Finn, you must take a dive.

Finn

Yeah, okay. But I'm a Card Wars super-Amadeus.

[corners a rat] Hello, Ronnie. [moves his lips]

[BMO's voice] "What do you want, BMO?" [squeaks]

Where is Finn's sock?

"I don't know what you're talking about, BMO. I didn't do nothing. Leave me alone!" [grooms his face; zoom on a lipstick smudge on the back of his neck]

[voiceover] I knew that lipstick anywhere. [spoke] How is Lorraine?

"You stay away from her! She is with me now, do you hear?"

Calm down, big guy. Me and Lorraine are... dinosaur bones.

"Good, 'cause I would be so jealous." [BMO shows picture to him]

Just tell me where the sock is, and I will let you go.

"I don't know, man!"

What if I put some knuckle in your eyeballs? Would that help you think?

"Okay, okay! Um... [BMO grabs arm pointing to Finn's sock] It looks like a grape juice stain on his sock. Check the pantry."

[voiceover] Bebe owned Bebe's, a dance club downtown. He yells at ladies.

Wake up, brainiac.

"BMO? Aah— aah! Arrgh!!"

Where is the sock, Bebe?

"Uh— [coughing] I don't know nothin' bout socks!"

Don't play dumb, Bebe! [takes some soot out the oven] Don't play dumb with me!

I talked to Lorraine, Bebe. She sold you out, dum-dum!

"No! She-she wouldn't do that! It wasn't me, I swear! It was Ronnie!"

Ronnie? But why?

"I don't know, man! I don't know! [sobbing] Oh, Lorraine!" [Bebe continues sobbing; BMO looks into his dirty sooted hands]

I'm gonna go wash this shmutz off my grabbers. When I get back, you better start talking sense.

NEPTR

Hello? Hello? Hello? Hey, BMO. Wake up, buddy. Are you all right? [BMO gets up]

NEPTR? I feel like l got hit with a Dracula by King Kong.

NEPTR

Whoa, sorry, man. You want some pie or something?

Sorry, I gotta run. The cops are after me. Have you seen any down here?

NEPTR

Nah. No one's been down here all day, except me, you, and Ronnie.

What?! What was Ronnie doing down here?

NEPTR

I don't know. But now my sensors indicate that some treasure is missing. [spins around] About a sock's worth.

[gasps] That's it! That's why Ronnie took the sock—to carry stolen treasure in with! He had to whack Bebe to keep him from squealing, then he pinned the rap on me.

NEPTR

Bebe's dead?

Listen, NEPTR, you better lay low for a while. I'm gonna go find Ronnie. [climbs ladder] I've got a score to settle.

NEPTR

Hey, BMO! We should hang out more. We're both robots.

[beat] No, NEPTR. I am not like you.

Finn

Hotcha! BMO, how do I look? [BMO's eyes turn into Xs]

Like the devil!

Jake

I mean, here you are chillin' with history's coolest friends building an actual pillow fort, but you just sit there sulkin'. I'm like, what gives?

Finn

[sigh] I guess I'm just thinking about Flame Princess. I told her a joke the other day, and she didn't even laugh or anything. Guess it's over between us.

Jake

That's it? A joke?

Maybe she just didn't get it yet.

Finn

Yeah right, Beemo. More like she used up all her laughs on some other guy's jokes, probably. Man, having a girlfriend is hard.

Jake

No! Being crazy is hard. You're getting all hung up, [stretches his arm around his face] all hung up on imaginary problems. [opens arm as a miniature Jake in his head] You gotta focus on what's real, man. [grabs a cup] You see this cup? This is literally my favorite cup. [throws cup out the window] Now it's gone forever, so it's not real, and I don't care about it anymore.

[gasps] Oh no! My favorite window!

Finn

I don't even know what you guys are talking about. [picks up sword and cup] I think I just need some alone time. Gotta let my mind fester a bit, you know? [enters pillow fort] I'll be back in a little while.

Jake

Finn, festering's always bad, man! There's no good kind of festering!! FIIINN!!!

Finn

That was Flame Princess. She said she didn't get my joke until now—and that it's really funny and awesome.

Haha, I knew it!

Jake

Yeah, that's great, man. Now what about this dream?

Finn

What dream?

Jake

The dream you were just talking about?

Finn

Huh?

Jake

Just a second ago?

Finn

[shrugs]

Jake

The DREAM you just had in the pillow fort?

Finn

Pfffbb.