Princess Bubblegum quotes from Adventure Time

Bubblegum

The Candy People are mercurial, but they're not dillweeds.

Bubblegum

You know I care about you. I think you're making the right choice. Your natural lifespan is going to be richer and fuller than you can imagine. And someday, when you die, I'll be the one that puts you on the ground.

Bubblegum

Finn, I get the sense that this trip's more important to you than your letting on. I mean, if you make it to that island, you might find out some pretty heavy stuff... about the humans, and where you came from, about yourself. Alls I'm saying is you have to promise me, promise me, that you'll come home safe.

Bubblegum

I'm connected to all candy throughout all the galaxies. Once you're candy, you'll be part of me, too!

Finn

Hey, Princess Bubblegum, when we bring the dead back to life, will they be filled with worms?

Bubblegum

No. If my decorpsinator serum works, then all the dead Candy People will look as young and healthy as you do.

Finn

[chest-pounding] Aaahh-AAAHH-AAAHHHH!!

Bubblegum

Pick up that platter, tough guy. [Finn opens platter with a dead mouldy Candy Person]

Finn

Old Mr. Cream Puff?

Bubblegum

[giggles] We used to date. [injects serum into Cream Puff]

Finn

Something's happening! Come on... come on!

Bubblegum

Work!

Finn

Algebraic!

Bubblegum

Wait, something's wrong.

SUGAR!!

Finn

Hey, look! The decorpsinator serum is working.

Bubblegum

No! This is wrong! They're not coming back to life, they're still dead! My decorpsinator serum — it's incomplete!!

Rah! Must eat sugar! Rugh—!

Finn

[pushes it down] You're grounded, mister.

Bubblegum

Oh, this is really bad. They're going to be attracted to the Candy Kingdom!

Finn

Why?

Bubblegum

Because the Candy People are made of sugar, ya ding-dong!

[gets on Bubblegum's lap] Gimme some sugar, baby...

Bubblegum

Aah!

Finn

Chew on THIS!! [kicks it]

Bubblegum

Hee... Good one, Finn. Quickly! To the Kingdom!

Finn

[kicks another] Get a life!!

Jake

Finn, truth or dare?

Finn

Dare! Ha ha!

Jake

I dare you... to tell me the truth about what's goin' on in your mind. What were you and Bubblegum talkin' about when you were alone together?

Oooooohh!!

Finn

Um, uhh... The truth is... uhh... [visualizes Bubblegum behind Jake]

Bubblegum

"You promised you wouldn't frickin' tell ANYONE!! Aw, you're so cute, Finn."

Finn

Ahhh... The truth is... that I'd rather play dodge socks! [throws sock at Jake's face]

Jake

I'm not playing dodge socks until you stop dodging my questions! Hey... [sniffs sock] Old Mr. Cream Puff? Isn't he dead?

Finn

Uh, give me my sock back! Dodge socks was a bad idea!

Jake

Whoa! Look, dude, just tell me what's up, because you are crazier than a cannibal tonight.

Princess Bubblegum

It's called the Enchiridion. It's a book meant only for heroes whose hearts are RIGHTEOUS. ["PUCHHOO!!"]

Finn

Shmowzow!

Princess Bubblegum

The book lies in the top of Mount Cragdoor, guarded by a manly Minotar. It's waiting for a truly righteous hero to claim it!

Finn

Do you think I've got the goods, Bubblegum? 'Cos I am [pounds floor] INTO THIS STUFF!

Princess Bubblegum

You're totally jealous of Ricardio.

Finn

Not I'm not! I just don't like the way he talks to you. It makes me feel weird.

Princess Bubblegum

That's jealousy, hon.

Finn

I'm not jealous! [echo yell] I'M WEIRD!!!

Jake

Woof, man. This is going bad!

Ice King

So let me get this straight... You're hitting on me.

Bubblegum

NO!!

Lady Rainicorn

Usgisine. Dangsin-eun uli gongjunim-egeo malhal jagyeogdo eobsneun nom-iya. (Verily, you are a creature unworthy even of my lady's disdain.)

Ice King

I think I heard the word "virile" in there. Oh, she's definitely hitting on me.

No! / Maldoandwae! (No way!)

Ice King

BEGONE, YOU BIDDIES!!!

Finn

Ladies and gentlemen—and Princess... I'm here to talk about multidimensional bubbles! But I am not just going to talk about blowing bubbles — I'm going to blow... your... minds.

Bubblegum

Hmm?

Finn

This is a bubble blower of my own design. With this, you can blow bubbles in different dimensions.

Finn

This two-dimensional bubble casts a one-dimensional shadow.

Finn

A three-dimensional bubble casts a two-dimensional shadow.

Finn

A fourth-dimensional bubble casts a three-dimensional shadow. It is beyond comprehension! Beyond space! Beyond time!

Bubblegum

Finn, that would mean you've created—

Finn

Yes—A BLACK HOLE!!! [everything starts to getting sucked into the hole]

Jake

WHOOAAHH!! [grabs a pole and stretches himself to another pole, holding the screaming crowd]

Finn

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah!! [Jake grabs him and pulls him into the group with Bubblegum] Whoa!

Bubblegum

Finn!! Do something!!

Finn

It's okay. I'm sure the solution is on my bulleted... LIST!! [the list gets sucked into the hole] Don't worry. I have EVERYTHING under control.

Bubblegum

UNDER CONTROL?! My guests are terrified!

Finn

YES!! And their brains are releasing adrenaline, dopamine, even dimethyltryptamine from the pineal gland!! This has serious educational value! Thanatophobia and this NDE is giving us euphoric altered awareness! Don't you see, Princess?! We were all BORN TO DIE!!

Bubblegum

YOU'RE TRYING TO KILL US ALL?!?

Finn

No, of course not! I'm trying to give you the GREATEST CONFERENCE EVER!!!

Bubblegum

Finn... you've gone insane!

Finn

What?! No way, I'm like the smartest guy in Ooo, thanks to these glasses.

Bubblegum

Glasses? Finn... take those off. You're not yourself!

Finn

But—

Bubblegum

[cries] Please!! I need the real you!

Lemongrab

This castle is in... unacceptable CONDITION!! UNACCEPTABLE!!!

Lemongrab

30 days in the dungeon!

Cinnamon Bun

For who?

Lemongrab

Everyone in this room... MHAHHH!!!

Bubblegum

Wait! Wait! You can't give orders like that! I'm in charge here, Lemongrab!

Lemongrab

TOO YOUNG!! She's too young to rule the kingdom!

Finn

[slap!] Watch your manners with the Princess!

Lemongrab

WHOOOOOOO!!?

Finn

What the huh?

Marceline

La da da da da, I'm gonna bury you in the ground

Bubblegum

Marceline, that's too distasteful!

Marceline

Oh... You don't like that? ..Or do you just not like ME?!

Bubblegum

[voiceover] "I was testing a sample of the zombie flesh I had saved when Cinnamon Bun came into the lab. He said he was hungry."

Cinnamon Bun

I'm hungry!

Not now, Cinnamon Bun, I'm busy!

[voiceover] "And that's when I made my mistake. I should have paid more attention to that poor fool."

[voiceover] "The Candy Zombie flesh he ingested was highly contagious." [CB groans, falls to floor behind the counter, and begins groaning violently]

Cinnamon Bun? What did you... EEEEEEK!!!

Cinnamon Bun

SUGAR..!!

Bubblegum

Just let Science to the work! Science is... MOOORRRAAAHHHH...!!!

Finn

NAAAAAOOH!!!

GET THAT ZOMBIE OUTTA HERE! RAHH!!

Finn

RAAGH!!

Aw naw. I am not getting eaten by zombies tonight. [...] GET THE LUMP.. OUTTA.. HERE!!

Bubblegum

Cinnamon Bun! Do something!

Cinnamon Bun

...Okay. Hey everyone! The concert is over!!

Bubblegum

That's not what I—

Cinnamon Bun

THE CONCERT'S OVER, PRINCESS!!!