If you'd have told me 20 years ago that I'd be getting married, I'd have so many questions. Like, "Are gays allowed to get married?" or "Can gays serve in the military?" And, "Why would we want either of those things?"
S10 E5Grace's Secret
S10 E6Kid'n'Play
NNoah
So, Grace tells me you think I'm a bit of a dick.
I never said that!
NNoah
I know. I'm just being a dick.
NNoah
[about not telling Grace he has a daughter] Look, if I could go back in time, I'd tell her on the first date. Of course, if I could actually go back in time, I'd kill Hitler, invest in Apple, then tell Grace.
S10 E7So Long, Division
Will, your brother died.
What?
He was doing his business in the neighbor's yard, and then he started shaking and just fell over.
Oh my God!
[crying] Oh, poor Dr. Silly!
[pause] Wait... your dog? I thought you meant Sam or Paul! And you made me picture them pooping in the neighbor's yard! Pooping and then dying? That's my worst fear!
LDLatino delivery man
So the order is: Latinos have it worst, then Black men, then gay guys.
MDMuslim delivery man
Oh, no no no. You have to put Muslims on the top of that list. Try being me and getting on a plane.
TTheodore
Try being me and getting a taxi.
LDLatino delivery man
Try being me and getting back into the country!
Try being me and having to claim Kevin Spacey as one of your own.
TTheodore
Well, he was good in The Usual Suspects.
Would you want him to be Black?
TTheodore
[pause] OK, I see your point.
S10 E8Anchor Away
RReuben
Hello, my name is Reuben, and today, I am a bar mitzvah. Can I have a private dance in the champagne room?
How dare you? I am a lady of quality!
RReuben
I have a $180 savings bond.
[taking his arm] Well, Reuben, you should have opened with that.
William Elizabeth Truman. You put our friendship over having a one night stand with a hot guy who's on TV every night.
[smiles] Yeah, I guess I did.
You dumb bitch.
S10 E9Family, Trip
You and Estefan are really getting married.
Our time has come. Before I was ready to settle down, I just had to get a couple guys out of my system... then in my system... and then back out of my system.
Honey, we need to do something about your doorman. He's a little handsy.
We don't have a doorman.
Ah. Well, that makes sense. What kind of doorman would test people for colon cancer?
S10 E10Dead Man Texting
OK, honey, BRB. I'm gonna go powder the inside of my nose.
RRex
You don't remember me, do you?
Oh, of course I do. [pause] OK, give me a clue.
RRex
I'm Rex. We went out last year.
A little more.
RRex
We slept together. You said you'd call, and you never did.
[pause] Yeah, I'm gonna need a little more than that.
RRex
We went to my parents' house for Christmas.
Oh, my God, of course! I'm so embarrassed. Can you ever forgive me, Johnny?
RRex
I already said my name was Rex!
Yeah, I'm in the middle of something, Johnny, gotta go.
S10 E11The Scales of Justice
Ugh, I can't believe how full I am. This food baby's daddy better make an honest woman out of me.
[Karen's stepdaughter is one of Will's students]
OOlivia
So, how is she? I mean, does she still sleep in a casket and live off the blood of villagers?
It would be inappropriate for me to answer that question, but yes.
OOlivia
I shouldn't have said that. It's misogynistic to refer to women as monsters or associated with the occult. I should have just called her a bitch.
S10 E12The Pursuit of Happiness
You know the best part about teaching? I can ride my bike to work because I don't have to get all dressed up.
Or, is the best part that you're in a position of power and there are all these hot young guys around, and if you ask them out, they have to say yes, or you'll fail them?
You do understand the difference between a law school and a porno set in a law school, right?
That was your First Lady trying to fix me up again.
Not sure we really trust her taste in men.
Like she had a choice.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Will & Grace pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.