I do realize the enormity of the challenge I face, which is why I have gone for the fastest car in the world. Here it is. [gestures to blue Toyota Corolla]
Engine size is irrelevant, James, because do you know what makes this so fast? Look in the window. [camera zooms in on Avis Preferred Service tag on mirror] I've rented it!
Yes. And this is the thing, with the Bugatti Veyron sometimes you're using 15 horsepower, sometimes you're only using ten. This, you've got 140 horsepower from the moment you start it up to the moment you crash it.
I don't believe you, and I think this has become a new mystery. It's like a yeti. So if maybe somebody's seen him, if you have seen Jeremy on his bicycle, write to us, please, at "Help, I've Burst From Laughing, Top Gear, Wood Lane, wherever". I don't believe you.
Jeremy
I'm going to ride down here — No, I'm not going to ride down here next week. That's idiotic. I barely ride to the paper shop.
[During the Budget Convertibles Across Spain Challenge]
Jeremy
[in the McLaren MP4-12C Spider] So, Spain. Six million unemployed and they have a smaller population than we do. Two million households have no income at all. 57 percent youth unemployment.
Jeremy
[voice over] Right now, though, James was dealing with rather more serious issues.
[in the Audi R8 V10 Spyder] The cabin is too blustery. I've got both the windows up and I have the windshield thing at the back up, but my hair still whips me in the eyeballs. I know some of you are going, "Why don't you get your hair cut, then?" Lots of people have lots of hair.
No, no, I'm not having that, there was nothing wrong with my skirt. The problem was that (Jeremy) just charged into the water, as usual, like an imbecile.
Well, hang on, that's not going to work. Because we know the voice recognition in cars is rubbish. It never works, does it? So, if you just say, "The Police", it will probably actually ring the police.
Jeremy
No, it will! It will, it will! Because this car's got a feature on it that if you have an accident or get into problems, it calls the emergency services for you.
"Oh, I'm in trouble, help!" [singing] "I need somebody, help!" What a terrible way to die, trapped in your car, listening to all the embarrassing rubbish on your iPod.
Am I going to miss Seb? Probably not a huge amount, no. In a competitive environment, there's always going to be a bit of needle. There's a lot of history between us two, obviously, that's gone before.
Jeremy
Did it start in Malaysia when he suddenly lost the ability to steer? It was basically "Don't overtake Mark", and then he heard everything apart from the "don't". I mean, you're an Aussie. Have you never felt tempted to … [showing his fist] "This is for Gallipoli, blam!"
MWMark Webber
A lot of people are saying yes. I'm a bit concerned. My dad always says, "You shouldn't hit boys, mate", so … [laughter]
[While being chased by the Top Gear Police Department for a challenge]
Jeremy
Recent figures say that in London, 12 police cars are crashed every day. And the reason is, it's because they are driving in high-energy difficult situations while under the influence … of the moustache.
Top Gear · 1,774 quotes
Jeremy
