SSimon
[On his fast lap] I wasn't even trying.
Simon
Top Gear · 1,774 quotes
Tied for 5th most-quoted character in Top Gear: in 5 of its 1,774 quotes
Most scenes with: Jeremy Clarkson (4)
Lines by Simon 1
Scenes with Simon 4
[after the end credits]
SSimon
Can we just stop the competition now?
No, we bloody can't; I'm going to phone Damon Hill next week!
[During the opening sequence.]
Tonight: One small stumble for man as we build a space shuttle; I drive a nuclear bomb disguised as a Mercedes; and Simon Pegg makes a hot fuzz in our Reasonably-Priced Car.
SSimon
[timidly] Help!
[To Simon Pegg in the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car interview]
Now, can I just move on, 'cause films, you're a bit of a buff I gather.
SSimon
I am a bit.
Star Wars, in particular.
SSimon
Yeah absolutely.
Did you not once write a three-and-a-half thousand word essay on why you thought C3PO was gay?
[Simon giving his explanations]
SSimon
And you could argue that C3PO is a kind of emasculated homosexual. Because he's very camp, but he was safe because he didn't have a willy.
Homosexual men have willies.
SSimon
He's sexually non-threatening.
Graham Norton's got a willy.
SSimon
How do you know?
[Jeremy is now at a loss of words, at which point the audience laughs]
[after revealing Simon Cowell has beaten Gordon Ramsay for first place on the Celebrity Lap Time Board.]
And Gordon Ramsay has just committed suicide.
SSimon
Well, to be fair to Gordon Ramsay, he's fat.
S10 E5 November 11th, 2007
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