Sideshow Bob quotes from The Simpsons

Sideshow Bob

"...By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown

[with Bart relaxing next to her] Yes, what are you supposed to be again?

Sideshow Bob

[responds in annoyance] A full professor! But the tenure committee is excruciatingly slow. [He looks up at Bart and mutters with a "Why I oughtta..." and grunting before he gives off a cluck like a chicken and lays an egg that rolls in front of him. At once, he feels humiliated and embarrassed.]

Sideshow Bob

To the point, we are evil geniuses who, somehow, lost every battle we've had with Homer Simpson.

Homer

[eating tinsels] What?

Sideshow Bob

So we decided to form this furious four!

Frank Grimes

Bob, seriously man, one suggestion? Shut up! I mean, the baby is already asleep.

Sideshow Bob

Awww.

Sideshow Bob

Wait, did you only asked me to sing to forestall your gruesome end?

Bart

Guilty as charged.

Lisa

Hello, Bob.

Sideshow Bob

H-how did you get in here?

Lisa

Well, I knew if I killed enough people in the most gruesome possible ways, they'd send me to your prison. But to get into your cell, I had a little help.

Sideshow Bob

Lisa the killer? I never thought you had it in you.

Lisa

[slicks back her hair] The Lisa you knew? Didn't. [musses it up again] But I'm another story!

Sideshow Bob

Oho, really? Split personalities? Trope alert! Call the first thought police!

Lisa

[scene shows Lisa killing her victims] Professor Lisa had no idea she was my accomplice. [scene changes back to the present] But she's gone now. She was my last victim. Or rather, [takes a knife, grinning menacingly] second to last.

Sideshow Bob

The penultimate! [Bob steps onto a rake and it whacks him. He grumbles.]