Lily quotes from The Loud House

Hello. [Offers a handshake, not recognizing her older sister] l'm Lily. [Lori sighs]

Luan

And the good news is that is nothing to worry about, we’re not a bad influence on Lily after all.

[putting their arms into the air to celebrate while Lucy is silent and putting her arms in the air] YAY!

[furiously] *BLEEP*!

Leni

Lincoln, you're perfect just the way you are!

Lori

You're kind.

Leni

You're fashionable.

Luna

You're rockin.

Luan

You're funny.

You're tough.

You're deep.

You're friendly.

You're smart.

You Yincoln Youd.

Lori

Now give me that jacket and go out there and just be you!

Well, who's gonna start?

[sighs] Dang it. [approaches Leonard] Gramps?

[chuckles] Yes, little minnow?

Fishy stuff no fun. Bad for camp.

[stops playing] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whaddya mean?

Luna

Gramps, dude, what Lily's trying to say is that all that fisherman stuff was great, when you were a fisherman.

Leni

But it's not so great for a camp. You have to make people wanna come here.

[overhearing Lincoln, realizing he stole the Mummy's cursed ring and cursed the family] MOM! Lincoln stole a ring from the Mystic Mummy of Mystery and cursed our family!

Luna

Oh, come on!

Lori

Seriously?!

Way to go, Lincoln!

Bad Lincoln!

Not to mention the ring is tacky. [lightning strikes close to where she's standing] Sorry, Mr. Mystic Mummy of Mystery, sir!

Folks, I'm sorry. It was a honest mistake. Can't I just put it back?

Unfortunately, no. According to my spell book, once you put the ring on, you activated the curse.

Lynn Sr.

[dismayed] Well, that's just great! I guess we're cursed for life for now! Check that off the old bucket list!

Not necessarily. According to this, there is one way to lift the curse. We'll be able to make an offering to the spirit of the mummy cuz we wanna make an offering to the spirit of the mummy. But we'll gather ingredients for a potion first cuz we want to gather ingredients for a potion first.

Rita

I'm sorry. We do not need to have many times for that. We need to get to that barrel race. That mummy is just gonna wait. [tries to head back to Camperzilla, reaches for the door, but lightning strikes, knocking her back on her back] Okay, offering it is.

Rita

[heavily sleep-deprived; tired] Lily, are you tired, yet? It's going on 3:00 AM, sweetie.

Woo! Da-da!

Rita

[tired] It's okay, it's not your fault. It's your dad's. [sighs] That is the last time he gives you a chocolate-covered espresso bean for dessert. [imitating her husband] "Uh, I thought it was raisin."

[picks up the phone as it rings while having her cup of coffee] Officer Shirley, what is your emergency?

Rita

[frantically] I just saw a toddler--okay, no, wait, my toddler and I just saw a burglar running out of Jean Juan's. [while Officer Shirley starts writing notes] He was a small man or a medium-sized teen. We couldn't see the face. It's dark out, and I'm tired, so my vision is a little blurry.

Ma'am, could you slow down?

Rita

But he was definitely stealing food, the fromage con queso, or maybe the churro baguettes. Oh. Oh, that sounds so good right now. [dozes off, but her head hits the steering wheel and accidentally honks it, snapping her awake] Ah! [accidentally drops her phone] Oh, hang on. I dropped my phone. Oh, here it is! Are you still there?

What are you and your kid doing out at 4:00 AM?

Rita

Okay, well, my husband gave her an espresso bean, and now she's wide awake. [to Lily as she tries to break free of the seat belt while gnawing on it at the moment] Sweetie, do you have to pee?

[thinking that Rita means her] No, I just went. Listen, hon, you're not the first tired mom to call in a little confused. Last night, we had a lady mistaking a possum for a werewolf. [chuckles] Why don't you go home and get some rest? [hangs up]

Rita

Ugh! Can you believe her? [tired] I am not just some tired... confused mom...

Rude!

Rita

You know what, Lily? I say we do some investigating of our own. We track down the thief, we get some evidence, and then we call that officer back and say, "Who's confused now?"

Yeah, yeah! This is exciting! We show her!

[stunned to see the thief is revealed to be…] Mrs. Bernardo?!

Well, normally, this is where you clap, but I'll accept stunned silence. [bows]

Rita

You're the thief?! Wait, what is going on?! Is this a dream?!

Apologies for scaring you. I'm just training for an audition to play a thief, a crook, a desperado of the night! When I saw you were following me, I decided to roll with it, as they say. [scoffs] Of course, I wasn't going to harm you.

Rita

You did all of this to prepare for an audition?! We submerged ourselves in cheese!

[claps] Bravo to that! What an excellent improv.

But what about all the-- [yawns] stuff you stole?

Oh, stinky child. I'm going to put everything back. Thespian's honor. I have done this many times.

Rita

Well, this has been one crazy evening, but I suppose I'm partly to blame. I never should have dragged my child along while trying to play detective. Lily, sweetie, I owe you an apology-- [sees Lily now sleeping on one of the benches] Wow. [picks her up] Look at that. I guess chasing you around all night finally put her to sleep.

Lynn Sr.

[answers the door] Oh, hi, Candace. [calling out] Lily, Ingrid's mommy is here!

Thanks for having Ingrid over. Lily is welcome at our place anytime. [leaves and gets into their car; to her daughter] Did you have fun, sweetie?

Yep, yep! [as her mother puts her in the booster seat] Look, look, look! Look what I got! [pulls Eunice out her backpack] I'm gonna name her Princess Cotton Candy!

How about you take your new friend to the grocery store with us?

[frantically after the car drives off] No, no, no, no, no! She take Eunice! [fearfully imagines what would Lola find out if she returns home]

[with her face turning red of rage] LILY!!! [roars lividly with a blast of fire from her mouth, which strongly blasts the roof open]

[dashes into Lincoln's room; frantically] Lincoln!

[yelps and fires a net out of his net cannon in midair and it lands on him] Dang it.

Need help. Big problem!

Lily, it's okay. Calm down. I'm sure whatever it is isn't that bad.

[grabs her brother by the face] I trade Eunice to Ingrid!

Well, it was nice knowing ya.

It was accident! They go to grocery store! Please help me get her back!

Ingrid! We have to trade back! Take Nugget, and I get back Eunice!

Her name is Princess Cotton Candy now, and no way! We traded, no backsies, those are the rules!

[worried] I'm toast, and not the yummy cinnamon kind.

No, you're not, Lily. I've got a plan. There's an issue of David Steele where he assembles a team to break into Golden Toe's lair to take his, you know, golden toe.

[confused] We're gonna take Ingrid's toe?

No. We'll do our own heist and get back Eunice before Lola ever knows she was missing.

Ooh, sneaky.

We just need a map of Ingrid's house.

Hmm. Perhaps I can assist. I, too, would like to protect our youngest kin from Lola's ire. Besides, I need Lily in one piece to complete the rest of our human nightlight test trial. I have a way we could get a full scan of Ingrid's house and the location of your desired target. I'll just have to initiate Todd's new pizza oven modification.

Welcome to Operation Unicorn Heist. We've set another playdate for Lily and Ingrid tomorrow, and we need all your special skills to help rescue Eunice before Lola gets home. Here's the plan: [Lily shows the first drawing of him talking to Candace] I'll distract Ingrid's mom. [the second drawing shows Luan keeping Ingrid busy with her clown entertainment] Luan, you keep Ingrid entertained. [the third drawing shows Lana distracting Ingrid's dog with a bone] Lana, you distract the dog.

Good luck. He's a biter. [turns around, showing a chunk bitten off by the dog]

[as Lily holds up the fourth drawing of herself swapping Eunice and Nugget in Ingrid's room] Lily, you get to Eunice in Ingrid's bedroom where you'll swap her for Nugget. [the fifth drawing shows Lynn retrieving Eunice by using a drone] Lynn, you're on extraction.

Yes! I love extracting junk!

[confused] And then we all hold hands under a rainbow?

[chuckles sheepishly, realizing she was holding a drawing of that and puts it away] That drawing for school.

STOP! If I keep this up, I'm going to need a coffin for real.

Well, if you're not gonna work for us anymore, we want our money back!

Yeah!

Figure it out, Lincoln!

[groans] You guys are right. I never should have borrowed money that I couldn't pay back. [looks at his David Steele action figure, sadly] I know what I have to do.

Lori

I heard Dad sneeze! Get inside! [quickly closes the door as her siblings dash inside her apartment]

Ugh. Dad is the worst when he gets a cold. He turns into such a baby. [to Lily] No offense, Lily.

[shrugs; not caring] Mmm.

Lori

Okay, guys, don't panic. We can all stay here until Dad is well again. [grabs her bag] I'll run to the grocery store and get supplies, so we can hunker down. [opens the door, ends up bumping into Rita as she appears and falls on the floor]

Rita

There you all are. Listen, your dad is a bit under the weather, and I have to get to work. I need you to take care of him till I get home. [the siblings all groan in dismay] I know he can be a little… dramatic when he's sick. [cringes as her husband sneezes loudly]

Lynn Sr.

[off-screen; weakly] I can't feel my face.

Rita

All you have to do is make sure he hydrates and rests.

Fine.

Lori

Sure, Mom.

Rita

Thanks, kids. I appreciate it. [leaves]

Lori

We can do this, guys. As long as we work together… [catches Lola trying to bail by sneaking out the window] Uh, Lola, no sneaking out the window.

Lynn Sr.

[sniffles the mucus in his nose and groans] Who's there? Are those my children?

Luna

It's okay, Pops. You've just got a cold.

Lynn Sr.

Oh, thank you kids for trying to give me hope. I know how bad it is. [sadly writes a will]

[takes the book out his hands] Oh, for the Oath of Hippocrates. [takes out a thermometer] Father, I am going to prove you're overreacting. Open up. [Lynn Sr. groans as she sticks the thermometer in his mouth, then checks her watch] See? 98.7 degrees. You're fine.

Lynn Sr.

[gasps in shock] Fine?! Normal is 98.6! I'm burning up! Can someone make me some toast and tea, please?

I'll do it!