[reading from Rose's diary] Dear Diary, I don't know how much longer I can stand living with these two pigs. At first, moving in with them seemed like a good way to save money, but it's just getting out of hand. If one isn't keepin' me awake all night with her squealin', the other one is belchin' in my face! [stops reading] You do that sometimes, Dorothy. After you've had a Denver omelet.
Dorothy
Look, this is a real invasion of Rose's privacy. And it's a Spanish omelet.
The most romantic thing was when Stan proposed. I went to the powder room and when I got back there was two long stem glasses filled with Dom Perignon. We clinked the glasses and Stan gave me a coy smile and I winked at him and I just down the champagne in one gulp....and it didn't go down smoothly. Later he told me that he put my engagement ring at the bottom of the glass. It turned up three days later.
[translating for Vincenzo] Before we begin, [Vincenzo speaks between each line] let's make one thing clear. I am in charge. I am the boss. I am the master. I Am the Walrus.
Dorothy
Ma, either your Italian is rusty or he's the world's oldest hippie.
Don't be silly Dorothy. They're delicious. You just have to know how to eat them. You hold your nose with one hand [holding nose] and you pop a krispie in your mouth with the other. Mmm! That tastes like cheesecake, fresh strawberries, and chocolate ice cream.
You know Dorothy, I just thought of something. Lorraine's family's gonna be black too, aren't they?
Dorothy
Yes Rose. You know, you could probably make them feel welcome if you do your version of that dance that the Huxtable's do at the beginning of The Cosby Show.
[to Greta] Look, race is not even an issue. I mean, your daughter is twice my son's age! What can a woman in her 40's possibly have in common with a boy in his 20's?
Stop it all of you! What difference does it make that Lorraine's a little long in the tooth and Michael's a skinny white boy? Can't you see they love each other? We should be celebrating not arguing whether or not it's right. Now what do you say we all join hands and sing a chorus of 'Abraham, Martin and John'?
Dorothy, when my son was five years old, he nearly burned down our whole town. Since then, nothing he does upsets me. Hell, he could marry Lillian Gish and I wouldn't care.
The Golden Girls · 1,009 quotes
Dorothy
