Stargate SG-1 · Season 4
[Teal'c and Col. O'Neill are standing on a patch of astroturf in front of the activated Stargate in full golf clothing, holding drivers. Teal'c shoots a golf ball into the gate.]
[appreciatively] Oh yeah! That'll play...How far is Alaris, anyway?
[As he tees up a ball for O'Neill to shoot] Several billion miles, O'Neill.
That's gotta be a record.
[O'Neill shoots a ball into the gate.]
[O'Neill is once again standing in front of the activated gate in full golf clothing. He begins his swing to shoot the ball into the gate...]
[off, over the speaker] Colonel O'Neill, what the hell are you doing?!
[turns to face the control room, which is behind and above the camera, shouts and gesticulates, frustrated] In the middle of my backswing?!
[O'Neill enters the control room in civilian clothing]
George. [He hands Gen. Hammond a sheet of paper, pulls up his sleeve and examines his wristwatch]
Colonel, what are you doing out of uniform?
Handing you my resignation.
[shocked] Resigning? What for?
[looking at his watch and obviously measuring his words to coincide with the end of the time loop] So I can do...this. [He kisses Carter deeply just before the loop repeats]
[O'Neill is in the mess, sitting with Daniel and Carter. He is eating oatmeal with obvious relish]
I don't think I've ever seen anyone enjoy oatmeal so much.
When you've been eating Froot Loops for who knows how long, a little variety helps.
We got a message from the Tok'ra. Apparently they've been trying to contact us for over three months.
Really?
Who knows when they first realized we were cut off? I mean, there's really no telling how much time passed.
Let me ask you something. In all the time you were…looping, were you ever tempted to…do something crazy? I mean, you could do anything without worrying about consequences.
You know, it's funny, you've asked me that before. [looks at Carter]
[Looks at Carter and smiles, then looks back at O'Neill] ...And?
[O'Neill just looks at Carter, smiles, and takes a bite of oatmeal. Fade to credits.]
You know what they say, General. If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try, try, try again.
How do you know that?
I have read extensive files on each of you.
How?
I learned to read English when I was six. It was not difficult.
…Russian humor.
If I say "What?" and you say "It's classified," I'm gonna shoot you.
If you're implying that everything Russian-made is of poor quality, the sub is Swiss.
So it occasionally catches fire but keeps perfect time? [pause] Sorry. I think I've been hanging around Jack O'Neill too much.
...
The gauge must be malfunctioning.
But it's Swiss.
[upon seeing the frozen Maybourne] Holy frozen bad guy!
Do not humans usually die when they are frozen?
Usually.
[The frozen Mayborne breathes out]
They usually don't breathe when they're dead either.
Can we stop agreeing on how we're going to die and start doing something about it?
[About parachuting from a plane]
This does not seem wise, O'Neill!
I said it was easy, not wise.
[O'Neill is standing with others in front of the Stargate that the Russians have been experimenting with, and the gate begins to activate.]
I think we should...
[the gate is about to open]
DUCK!
[gate opens overhead]
[Chaka, a juvenile Unas, has captured an exhausted Dr. Jackson and is dragging him through the woods]
Okay, I know it seems completely unlikely that you understand a word I'm saying but, uh, I've gone about as far as I can go at this particular pace, so, with your permission, I'm going to fall down now. [collapses]
[glares]
Rest! This is a thing you should, uh, become familiar with. Rest… It means, uh… "rest."
[growls]
That's close. Try again: "grrrrest."
It's not my thing.
What isn't?
People. I mean, give me a million-year-old fossil and I'll tell you what it had for breakfast, but I'm not too good at people. They're too recent.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Stargate SG-1 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
