Teal'c quotes from Stargate SG-1

Teal'c

Many things are complicated, General Carter. In Jaffa society, loving one's children is not one of them.

Teal'c

We have caught nothing. We are fishing.

Teal'c

On Chulak, when a great warrior retires from the field of battle it is custom to sing a song of lament. [Hammond looks at him expectantly] Fortunately, we are not on Chulak.

Teal'c

[Holding up a toy gun] Children of the Tau'ri are also fond of colorful weapons that do not function.

Teal'c

If you are to die, Daniel Jackson, I wish you to know that I believe that the fight against the Goa'uld will have lost one of its greatest warriors. And I will have lost one of my greatest friends.

Teal'c

I would prefer not to consume bovine lactose at any temperature.

Teal'c

Colonel O'Neill has officially informed me that I have my mojo back.

Col. O'Neill

I can save these people!!

Col. O'Neill

Help me! [pause, quieter] Help me.

Teal'c

Many have said that.

Teal'c

But you are the first I believe could do it!

Col. O'Neill

Hey, come on!

Teal'c

I have nowhere to go.

Col. O'Neill

For this you can stay at my place, let's go!

Col. O'Neill

What the hell is that?!

Teal'c

It is an infant Goa'uld, the larval form of the gods. I have carried one since I was a child, as all Jaffa carry one.

Col. O'Neill

Well, get it out of there.

Teal'c

In exchange for carrying the infant Goa'uld into maturity, a Jaffa receives perfect health and long life. If I were to remove it, I would eventually die.

Col. O'Neill

Hell, if I were you, I'd take my chances.

Teal'c

I will pledge my allegiance to this world.

Col. O'Neill

I'm just not sure that's ever going to be enough for them to trust you. To be honest with you, I think they're scared of you.

Teal'c

I understand.

Col. O'Neill

You must be used to that by now, huh?

Teal'c

I am a Jaffa. I have served as a warrior for your enemy. I have carried your enemy within me.

Col. O'Neill

Yeah. Well it's kind of a human thing. We tend to be afraid of things we don't know.

Teal'c

Why is O'Neill not afraid?

Col. O'Neill

Teal'c, I saw you stand up to a god. Refuse to kill. I saw you make that decision.

Teal'c

Yes.

Col. O'Neill

In that moment I learned everything I needed to know to trust you.

Capt. Carter

Do you think this thing is going to end up being a revolutionary drug back on Earth?

Dr. Jackson

Well if it does, I'm sure someone else will end up getting credit for it. It's not like we can tell them where it really came from.

Col. O'Neill

Damn, guess I'm going to have to cancel that Oprah interview!

Teal'c

What is an Oprah?

Teal'c

Col. O'Neill?

Col. O'Neill

[imitating Desi Arnaz] Lucy, I'm home!

Teal'c

I am not Lucy.

Col. O'Neill

I know that. It's a reference to an old TV—never mind, open the door.

Teal'c

I will summon the doctor.

Col. O'Neill

No, come on. I'm fine. I'm back to being myself. Just open up.

Teal'c

I cannot be certain that you are back to being yourself. You referred to me as "Lucy."

Teal'c

Your world is a strange place.

Dr. Jackson

...So is yours.

Capt. Carter

[picking up a crystal shard] Here's a good one.

What's going on in there?

Teal'c

You received permission for me to fire my staff weapon in the Gate Room?

Capt. Carter

[Turning quickly to leave] Oh, yeah.

Dr. Jackson

[Turning quickly to leave] Absolutely.