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4 QUOTES

A character in SpongeBob SquarePants

Johnson quotes from SpongeBob SquarePants

Played by Mr. Fite · 4 quotes

In 4 of the 1,068 quotes from SpongeBob SquarePants
Most scenes with: Abrasive SpongeBob (2), Patrick (2), Squidward (2)

Scenes with Johnson 4

[A crowd of fish is searching for SpongeBob.]

CFCap Fish

SpongeBob!

Hey SpongeBob!

SpongeBob!

[hiding behind a rock] If I don't give these feverish favor-seekers the slip, I'll never get to fly with the jellyfish. [quietly flies away]

Hey! There he is! [SpongeBob flies faster] He's getting away!

No! He owes us favors!

Get him!

[The angry crowd chases after him, into Downtown Bikini Bottom; while SpongeBob flies past the buildings in a straight line, the crowd runs up and down each building; they stop at a cliff, before Jellyfish Fields; SpongeBob keeps flying.]

I'm almost at Jellyfish Fields. I'm gonna make it!

JJohnson

He's headed for Jellyfish Fields! We'll never catch him now!

CJCannonball Jenkins

[off-screen] I'll take care of this!

CCrowd

It's Cannonball Jenkins!

CJCannonball Jenkins

[inside a lit cannon, wearing a red helmet and suit; launches out of the cannon and toward SpongeBob; he collides with him, and SpongeBob's inflatable pants explode; the two hurtle toward the ground; SpongeBob falls even further as Cannonball Jenkins opens up a red parachute] I told you nothing good would come from city folk and their flying machines! [the crowd watches as SpongeBob crashes to the ground; they walk over]

What have we done? [starts to cry] Come on, everybody! I think a proper burial is in order. [picks up the pants] A pair of pants like these come around... once in a lifetime. [the crowd leaves; SpongeBob, now in his underwear, regains consciousness]

Well, it was fun while it lasted. [walks up to Jellyfish Fields, then walks away] I guess I'm not meant to fly after all. [sighs; starts to raise up in the air; a group of jellyfish are below him, carrying him up] Huh? Hey! My jellyfish friends are helping me fly! Without pants! I guess it just goes to show... [the jellyfish carry him back to Bikini Bottom] ♪You don't need a plane to fly♪ [Incidental 41 looks out the window at him] ♪Plastic wings may make you cry♪ [a flock of scallops fly by] ♪Kites are made for windy days. Lawn chair with balloons... fly away♪ [the crowd of fish bury SpongeBob's pants as the mourn over them] ♪Inflatable pants... you may as well skip!♪ [arrives at his home; the jellyfish put him back on the ground] ♪If you want to fly, all you need... is friendship. Yeah.♪ [the jellyfish buzz away; waves] Goodbye, jellies! You taught me a valuable lesson. Although I'm not quite sure what it was.

[walks up] Hey! Let's fly down to the pizza house for a slice.

No more flying for me, Patrick. I'll leave that to the jellyfish. [opens his door]

Suit yourself. [lifts up his arm and flies]

[turns back around] Did Patrick just...? [laughs] Nah! [enters his house again, but opens the door one last time, just to make sure]

[crazily] His driver's license! [starts laughing] At last! At last and your name is "Mr. What Zit Tooya"? [sees his driver's license revealing his original name] What kind of ridiculous name is that?!

It's my ridiculous name! "WHAT ZIT TOOYA"!

JOfficer Johnson

[hits Squidward on the head with his baton as he falls down] That's enough of that ballyhoo. [handcuffs Squidward]

But I didn't intentionally do anything wrong.

JOfficer Johnson

Tell it to the judge, lawbreaker. [puts Squidward in the police car as the siren blares and it takes off]

You once again managed to single-handedly annihilate what might be the one and only chance I may ever get to sew just one tiny seed of creative hope into the culturally barren wasteland that each and every one of us is forced to call home!

Actually, I've been commuting from upstate.

Now, I don't suppose you two have anything to say for yourselves?

Well, I guess if I was to say one thing, it would have to be: We're sorry, Squidward. [Squidward looks horrified as SpongeBob revealed Squidward's name]

Yeah, we're sorry, Squidward.

[frantic] No, no, no, no, no! Shh shh shh...

Hey, did those guys just call you Squidward?

[frantic] No, no, no, no, no! They said "Squilliam"!

Oh! I knew this guy was phony from minute one! I'm gettin' outta here.

Yeah, me, too! I'm gonna get my tuition back!

No! Wait! [everyone walks to the door and Squidward blocks it] NO! You're not going anywhere!

[The door is smashed open and several police fish run in. Squidward, who was flattened against the wall by the door, is grabbed by them]

Wha-What's going on here?

JJohnson

Sorry, Professor, your little symphony is over.

MSMusic School Headmistress

[she and the real Squilliam Fancyson are there] It's true, we're onto your little ruse! [the reporter and cameraman are there too]

BBBikini Bottom News Reporter

What a hot scoop!

MSMusic School Headmistress

The real Squiliam as we all know has a large bushy unibrow just at the base of his forehead.

But... [a police officer rips off Squidward's Wig]

GPGreen Police Fish

No unibrow. Squidward Q. Tentacles, i'm placing you under arrest for impersonating a genius.

[Squidward is handcuffed and taken away by the police. SpongeBob takes out the metronome, starts it, and he and Patrick start swaying to the rhythm again]

SPSpongeBob and Patrick

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick...

S6 Professor Squidward
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's SpongeBob SquarePants pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.