I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready... for me money. [the crowd gathers around him] Welcome to Pretty Patties. May I take your money?
We want a refund, Krabs! [crowd form a mob while yelling and protesting in agreement]
GusYour dumb Pretty Patties turned my face purple! [shows his purple face]
SMScottish Man
Look what I got under me kilt! [raises his kilt to reveal a plaid body, and white underwear]
GFGrease Fish, Female Fish & Frank
And look at our tongues!
[They show Mr. Krabs their respective tongues. They each show a yellow tongue, an orange tongue with green spots, and a tongue that just looks normal]
[turns off a light to reveal his tongue is glow-in-the-dark green] We want our money back. All 46,853 of us. [turns the light back on, but Mr. Krabs is gone]
[Mr. Krabs screams and runs, and the crowd chasing him makes a rainbow road]
Gus
Good day, young sir! My name is--
[pops up from under Gus' hat] Gus!
Gus
He's right! This guy's so good, you should give him a prize.
[grabs SpongeBob] How in Neptune's creation do you know all these names, SpongeBob?
Well, I simply compile the name of every customer in this book. [holds up a book called "The Customers of The Krusty Krab and Why I Love Them. By SBSP"]
[grabs the book] Thanks, SpongeBob!
You once again managed to single-handedly annihilate what might be the one and only chance I may ever get to sew just one tiny seed of creative hope into the culturally barren wasteland that each and every one of us is forced to call home!
Actually, I've been commuting from upstate.
Now, I don't suppose you two have anything to say for yourselves?
Well, I guess if I was to say one thing, it would have to be: We're sorry, Squidward. [Squidward looks horrified as SpongeBob revealed Squidward's name]
Yeah, we're sorry, Squidward.
[frantic] No, no, no, no, no! Shh shh shh...
Hey, did those guys just call you Squidward?
[frantic] No, no, no, no, no! They said "Squilliam"!
Gus
Oh! I knew this guy was phony from minute one! I'm gettin' outta here.
Yeah, me, too! I'm gonna get my tuition back!
No! Wait! [everyone walks to the door and Squidward blocks it] NO! You're not going anywhere!
[The door is smashed open and several police fish run in. Squidward, who was flattened against the wall by the door, is grabbed by them]
Wha-What's going on here?
Sorry, Professor, your little symphony is over.
MSMusic School Headmistress
[she and the real Squilliam Fancyson are there] It's true, we're onto your little ruse! [the reporter and cameraman are there too]
BBBikini Bottom News Reporter
What a hot scoop!
MSMusic School Headmistress
The real Squiliam as we all know has a large bushy unibrow just at the base of his forehead.
But... [a police officer rips off Squidward's Wig]
GPGreen Police Fish
No unibrow. Squidward Q. Tentacles, i'm placing you under arrest for impersonating a genius.
[Squidward is handcuffed and taken away by the police. SpongeBob takes out the metronome, starts it, and he and Patrick start swaying to the rhythm again]
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick...
SpongeBob SquarePants · 1,068 quotes
