Mrs. Cartman quotes from South Park

Get some today, and say with me – Beefcake!

Beefcake.

BEEFCAKE!!

Beefcake!

BEEEFFCAAAAAKE!!!

May cause irreversible damage to the kidneys and liver.

Mom, [he turns his head to the left] can you get me some Weight Gain 4000?

Okay, Eric, I'll get you some tomorrow.

but mum I need it for tomorrow mum.

But tomorrow's grocery shopping, Eric.

MOM...![he starts yelling gibberish, while throwing his Cheesy Poofs]

Okay, okay! Well, I guess I'll be going to the store now then.

Mom, can I ask you a question?

Sure, Hun.

You know how my friend Stan has, like, a dad?

Uh-huh.

And my friend Kyle has a dad and my friend Kenny has a dad?

Yes?

Well, what's your question, Hun?

Goddamn it, do I have a dad?!

Oh!

I want to know where I came from.

Oh. Hmm. Well, you see, Eric, sometimes when a man and a woman are attracted to each other, they want to be close to each other.

Uh-huh...

And sometimes the man puts his hoo-hoo dilly in the woman's cha-cha.

So who put his hoo-hoo dilly in your cha-cha?

When was the fetus conceived?

Eight years ago.

So that would make the fetus-

Eight years old.

That places you in what we call 'the 40th Trimester'.

Stan

[walks up with Kyle and Kenny] Come on, fat ass, we have to go!

Ey! Don't call me fat! [Mrs. Cartman giggles] Mom, don't laugh.

I'm sorry, hon.

[to his friends] I can't go with you guys right now.

Stan

Yes you can, Porky. [Mrs. Cartman giggles again]

Mom, seriously! [her giggles die down]

Oh, that's not funny, boys. Eric isn't fat, he's big-boned.

Kyle

He must have a huge bone in his ass, then. [Cartman's mom bursts out laughing]

God damn it, Mom!