[Kenny appears out of nowhere]
[blankly, as though Kenny hadn't appeared out of thin air] Oh, hey, Kenny.
“Cartman's Mom Is Still a Dirty Slut” · Season 2, Episode 2
In this episode: Jimbo (4), Mayor McDaniels (3), Eric Cartman (2), Mr. Garrison (2), Stan Marsh (1), Officer Barbrady (1), Narrator (1), Ned (1)
Officer Barbrady, let's pretend for one second that we had a competent law enforcement officer in this town. What would he do?
NNurse
When was the fetus conceived?
Eight years ago.
NNurse
So that would make the fetus-
Eight years old.
NNurse
That places you in what we call 'the 40th Trimester'.
DDoctor
Well, this is about all I can do for him.
Can't you get him to talk? I have to know who my father is.
DDoctor
Sorry, son, it might be a while.
[bounds atop Mephesto and begins slapping him around] Wake up, you son of a bitch!
CChef
Whoa!
DDoctor
Team A will consist of myself, Eric, Stan, Kyle and Nurse Goodly. Team B will consist of Kenny.
Can't go on... So hungry...
We're all going to die in this horrible place.
We have to have the energy to make it through the night. We have to eat.
FDFilm Director
How can we? How could we live with ourselves?
There's only one answer: Eat Eric Roberts.
Yes, of course! Nobody gives a shit about Eric Roberts.
Eat Eric Roberts!
[they all together walk towards Eric Roberts]
EREric Roberts
No! No, please!
[cut to commercial...]
[Eric Robert's mutilated corpse is visible. The other characters in the studio are feasting on his remains.]
Well, there's no going back now. We're cannibals! God save us...
God wants you to live, Mayor. Fight!
We'll give it until another hour, then... we might have to eat again.
FDFilm Director
What?! Christ, are you people diabetic or something?
It's over! We're free!
Yes, but at what cost, Mr. Garrison? At what cost?
Listen, everybody! We did what we had to in there.
But how will we live with ourselves now?
NNed
One day at a time, Mayor. One day at a time.
[Schubert's 'Ave Maria' plays as the camera zooms back]
Well, I'm bringing home some Eric Roberts in a doggy bag. Does anybody else want some?
Wait a minute! [points at his mom/dad] If she's my dad, who's my mom?
Who is Eric Cartman's mother? Is it Ms. Crabtree, Sheila Broflovski, the Mayor?
AGH, FORGET IT!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.