Kate Todd quotes from NCIS

Gibbs

It's just a lump of dead skin!

Kate

Well there's an armed forces registry. All their DNA would be on file!

Gibbs

That was created to identify bodies ONLY!

Kate

Well there's gotta be a way around that!

Gibbs

Now you're thinking like an NCIS agent! (Kate smiles at him and bites her lip)

Abby

You're looking at infrared of Bolivia's Best!

Gibbs

Cocaine?

Tony

The killer's using it?

Abby

Oh no way! The rock's too pure! This is probably from the cutting and the weighing!

Kate

Why don't I think that Thumper was killed cause of Cpl Ramsey's rigging?

Kate

I was in the Secret Service, we tend to get all hot and bothered over large numbers of $100 bills.

Tony

Is that what does it for you?

Kate

What does it for me, Tony, is a mystery you will never find out.

Tony

But, I know the answer.... Grant.

Kate

He's been searching for a case, any case, since I came in.

Tony

[reading from an e-mail] "All agents not working active cases are to attend the sexual harassment lecture at the NCIS human resource training center at 0930 hours today."

Gibbs

[deadpan] I cannot sit through another one of those. I will shoot myself.

Kate

You mean they train you guys how to harass? [Gibbs turns and looks at her] Hey, I'm kidding, except for Tony.

Tony

For the last time, Kate, I was only trying to get my seatbelt on.

Gibbs

Well, we might get lucky

Kate

(typing on her laptop) No-one's that lucky!

Gibbs

We are

Kate

He could be a service man doing his job!

Gibbs

(as the terrorist starts shooting he yells) No, I don't think so!

Tony

No boss, you don't understand. I love Puerto Rico.

Kate

Been there a lot?

Tony

[excited at the beginning...trailing off at the end] No that's just it, I've never been there... I mean I'm so wanting to go. Ever since I was a kid I was just...so wanting...sorry...I just always...

Gibbs

[deadpan] Wanted to be there.

Tony

Yeah.

Kate

So they pretty much hate us.

Tony

Noooooooooo........... Pretty much.

Tony

Aren't you guys interested at all in what I brought you back from Puerto Rico?

[sighing] Sure. Fine.

Kate

You gotta be kidding.

Tony

A bikini. Two-piece.

Kate

A bottom. And a hat??

Tony

Puerto Rican!

Gibbs

Any chance you're going to try that on?

Kate

[tosses it at Gibbs] You first.

Gibbs

[looks over the bikini bottom] Trust me. It's not gonna fit.

Kate

Pigs. I work with pigs.

Tony

[as Gibbs is opening his gift] It's a fantasy RPG book. Complete with character sheets and dice. Baby steps, Gibbs. Baby steps.

Gibbs

It's in Spanish.

Tony

There's just no pleasing you, is there?

If you need anything--

Gibbs

I won't hesitate. [MCPO leaves]

Kate

Why didn't that sound sincere.

Gibbs

You get used to it. They either stonewall or kiss-ass. To them, we're the internal affairs of the Navy.

Kate

So basically, they hate us.

Tony

Noooooooooo... [he and Gibbs look at each other] Pretty much.

Tony

The golf clubs belonged to his RIO, Lt. Lynch.

Kate

RIO?

Tony

Radar Intercept Officer. Also called a GIBs, one B - short for guy in back.

Kate

[to Gibbs] What do you need two B's for?

Gibbs

Second one's for bastard.

Gibbs

If that thing came off an aircraft, someone filed a TFOA report for it.

Kate

TFOA?

Tony

Things falling off aircraft.

Kate

You're kidding.

Gibbs

Nope. Navy keeps records on that sort of thing, all the way back to biplanes.

Pull!

Gibbs

Very nice. Very nice.

Thanks. You here to shoot?

Gibbs

I hope not. I'm Special Agent Gibbs. This is Special Agent Todd, NCIS. Lady inside said you're the manager, Randy Wiles.

Kate

Formerly Ensign Randy Wiles.

I saw the news. If you're here to talk about Mark, I told you guys all I know years ago.

Gibbs

You didn't say you were gonna marry his wife.

You talked to Mary?

Kate

I did. And funny thing, she never once mentioned marrying her husband's shipmate.

She doesn't know that Mark and I served together.

Gibbs

How could she not know?

We met at Mark's memorial service.

Gibbs

What did you say? "I was passing by, dug the music, decided to drop in?"

Something pretty close to that. I was afraid if I told her I knew Mark, she'd ask a lot of questions. I didn't think I'd fall in love with her. And then when I did, it was too late.

Kate

Bounce.

Yeah.

Gibbs

Bounce?

Kate

It's a film. Ben Affleck gives up his seat on this flight for a guy who needs to get home. Plane crashes, guy dies. He looks up the widow, Gwyneth Paltrow. He means to tell her the story, but by the time they come around to it, they've fallen in love, and he's afraid if he tells her, it'll ruin it.

That's what happened to me.

Kate

I believe him.

Gibbs

Of course you believe him. It's a chick flick. In a guy flick, you steal the money, you set Lieutenant Schilz up to take the fall, you murder him and you marry his wife.

That is sick.

Kate

It sure is.

Nice drive, Ben.

Oh, yeah.

For someone with your swing.

Kate

Ms. Toner! The pro told me you were teeing off.

I was trying to.

Kate

Sorry. I just drove in from D.C. to speak with you. It'll only take a few minutes.

Do you know anything about golf etiquette, young woman?

Kate

Not really.

This is a private club. How'd you get in here?

Kate

[shows them her NCIS badge and gun] I showed these at the gate.

Kate

This...isn't the deck 5 berthing compartment, is it?

(while standing at a urinal) No ma'am this is the men's head on deck 6.

Kate

All I'm saying is that... things on the surface are not always the same as when you put them in context with the way they actually developed, you know, under the surface, kinda.

Tony

I have no idea what you said.

Kate

Neither do I. But the intent was sincere.