Mary quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000

The problem to is factor x² - 9x + 20. Now how do you do it?

Aw, let's just cheat!

x² - 9x + 20. You take the x² - 9x... [Mary shakes her head]

Nobody home, huh?

Oh, you subtract the x from x², and then you...

John, this is geography!

What would Liberace do? Nah, better not do that.

Servo

One of 32 short films about... this guy.

Let's see. What rhymes with "blue balls"?

Wait a minute! I work for Otis Elevators! I don't write music!

Servo

Mickey Rourke came over to help.

No inspiration, darling?

I couldn't write "The Farmer in the Dell" today.

Why would you wanna write him?

[singing] I wish I had a castle in the sky...

Mike

[angrily] Yeah, well, wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which one piles up first!

[singing] Away up high where bluebirds like to fly...

[singing] I wish I could have sex with Louis Nye...

[singing] A cozy, little castle with 100 rooms or more...

[singing] I wouldn't have to dress like Tipper Gore...

[singing] I wish my living room were all redone...

[singing] I think owning a newspaper would be fun...

[singing]: I wish the faucet wouldn't drip all day...

AIM HIGH, SISTER!

Oh, I wish Hardware Hank hadn't done my kitchen!

[singing] I wish that refridgerator door would close and stay closed...

Oh, sure, everyone dump on the refridgerator.

Miss Betty Furdess and the new Westinghouse!

[singing] I wish I had a stove whose pilot was always lit...

[in a Australian accent] Well, don't look for it now. It's only available in the year 2000!